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fuzzygreysocks's definitions

beauty candle

An attribute which begins to burn immediately at first impression as the viewer becomes increasingly aware the subject is indeed NOT attractive to look at.
Typically, as a romance wanes the candle burns faster.
The beauty candle for some women burns rather rapidly; almost a flare, really.

For others the beauty candle burns slow, taking hours, days or even years to realize "Hmm... She's kinda weird looking. Not pretty at all. What was I thinking"
by fuzzygreysocks January 25, 2010
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functional dysfunctional

A person whom while able to minimally function in society, hold a job (at varying degrees of success), feed, clothe & house themselves still remain a disaster at nearly all other personal & social aspects of life.

They are your severely disturbed, paranoid and/or inappropriate coworkers, family & friends, yet remain gainfully employed, operate vehicles daily and manage to not starve to death.
Because of their multiple failed relationships and substance abuse charges, Brittney & Lindsey remain the poster children for the functional dysfunctional.
by fuzzygreysocks January 26, 2010
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library effect

The excited need to poop stimulated by perusing the library.
This effect may be observed at any any favorite store or place.
After a few minutes of looking at (whatever) the library effect kicked in sending Steve to the bathroom.
by fuzzygreysocks January 26, 2010
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vampire tits

Breasts so unattractive they should never see the light of day.
Steve vurped when she removed her bikini.
"Vampire tits!" he thought, as he turned off the merciful lights.
by fuzzygreysocks November 18, 2010
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relevant procrastination

Performing arguably "useful" searches in a store or on the internet when in fact you're just wasting time and goofing off.
Instead of scouring the bookstore or internet for assistance with his calculus homework, Steve spent untold hours engaged in relevant procrastination researching netbook computers "for his mom".
by fuzzygreysocks May 10, 2010
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faillapalooza

A epically pitiful, sad and lame organized event attended and appreciated by loooosers.
Steve's high school birthday parities were always epic faillapaloozas where a few losers giggled over a single can of beer, his dad's old Victoria'a Secret catalog and ultimately spent most of their time mass debating over PC vs Mac OS.

The company Christmas party is a faillapalooza for reluctant department heads & their sycophants.
by fuzzygreysocks May 31, 2010
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girl minute

equal in time to about ten, maybe fifteen, guy minutes.
Baby, yelling from the bedroom walk-in closet "I'll be ready in just a minute, Honey"
Honey, sitting on the living room couch for the last half hour deleting things from his cell phone "K, Baby. Is that a girl minute or a boy minute?"
"Girl!"
Honey turns on the TV, kicks up his shoes on the coffee table, throws the remote to the other side of the couch.
by fuzzygreysocks June 8, 2010
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