fearman's definitions

like a crystal cow in knackerland

Used of something or someone unsuited to a given environment, placed there hopefully for well-intended reasons but left defenceless. From a decision by the relevant authorities in Dublin, Ireland in recent years to mount life-size statues of cows in various media and colours in outdoor locations throughout the centre of the city. The cows were soon vandalised, including one dainty little critter with an elaborate design of cut glass that was left, as you do, in one of the less salubrious areas of the city centre and promptly smashed.

She left little Johnny off at school to face the roughest class in the place, like a crystal cow in knackerland.

by Fearman February 10, 2008

hippie pepper

1. A really sexy looking, easy going hippie chick. Free loving, Earth Momma type. A hot altie.

2. Mould growing on food, often from a combination of lack of preservatives due to Luddite fears and either a tendency to forget the food is there, or an inability to use it up fast enough, on the part of the slightly addled individual who bought it.

Ginny's walking out topless with her bump again. She's a real bit of hippie pepper, all right.

Guess what? There's hippie pepper all over the great BIG bag of garlic again.

by Fearman January 13, 2008

Bjork

Pixie-like rock starlet born in Iceland in 1969 or some such. Died in a car crash in 1990. All subsequent appearances, including those in concert before half the population of Iceland, have been computer-generated. IT'S TWOOO!!!

Bjork is appearing in concert tonight. Every last pixel of her. Gorgeous.

by Fearman November 22, 2007

atheist

Someone who refuses to bow to the alleged power of any alleged supernatural entity, however great that power is alleged to be. One of a group of people far wiser and more common than they are usually given credit for. Someone who thinks in terms of reason rather than fear. In particular, someone who refuses to let their perfectly natural fear of death overwhelm their reason. Someone who accepts that even if there were a god worth worshipping, which cannot be proved, the divinity would be worth worshipping precisely because it supports or represents such things as justice, truth, love and compassion, which are universal human ideals and are not, contrary to the propaganda, derived from any religion. Someone who accepts that, as guides to the good life, such ideals therefore come before all else. A humanist. Atheists are often accused, by religionists who have found support in postmodernist relativism, that atheism is a religion like any other. If anorexia could be considered a favourite food, these postmodernist types might have a point ... but I'm doubting it.

Someone once said there are no atheists in foxholes. Firstly, oh yes there are: and secondly, even if it were true, that would be more an argument against foxholes than against atheism.

by Fearman September 6, 2007

silicone ship

A busty woman, obviously heavily augmented in the breast area.

Don't look now, but I see two silicone ships at three o'clock.

by Fearman November 25, 2007

axis of evil

A list of countries that "President" Bush II chooses to use as a distraction from domestic issues and questions about his own popularity. Members of the axis are usually (but not invariably) Muslim, are often grindingly poor outside the palaces of tribal elites, and more to the point do not possess the ability, as states, to retaliate against American soil if subjected to an armed invasion.

China is not part of the Axis of Evil because it possesses ICBMs and incidentally is a large market for American businesses.

by Fearman January 29, 2008

third arm

Somebody who considers themself so tied to someone else that they are only there to do the other's bidding. A slave. By analogy with an actual third arm, with which the owner of the arm could hope to do so much more, but which has no independent life of its own.

Mary is trying to treat Jimmy like her third arm again. She won't even let him go out for a night with the lads.

by Fearman March 28, 2008