failure33object's definitions

half pincer

an intricate play used in games such as American football, hockey and checkers. involves forming an enclosure around a player to force him/her into submission. favoured by Mrs. Doubtfire, transvestite nanny, and Saint Jackolas, checkers icon.

St. Jackolas "man, check my badass half-pincer on Macaulay, Mrs. D!"
Mrs. Doubtfire "ooh very nice dear!"
Macaulay "please let me go home now."

by failure33object April 23, 2005

wizard of oz

a nutcase who rules a magical land from behind a curtain, despite being only 1.9 foot tall. often seen fighting with Toto. well known for being a roght miserable git. and also owner of a hot air balloon.

Wizard: "Toto give me back that sausage!"
Toto: *runs off with sausage*
Wizard: "you little bastard!!"

by failure33object April 18, 2005

winston churchill

the man! ceegar-chomping, country-beating, Hitler-dominating badass! the man who saved Britain from a future of camp haircuts and rotten food. and possible buggery. a very tough man who could stand up to anyone and scare them off.

the scene: a dinner party.
*Winston C farts loudly*
Aggrieved Gent: "How dare you pass wind in front of my wife!"
Winst: "I'm sorry, I didn't know it was her turn."

by failure33object April 24, 2005

eagle eye cherry

a one-hit wonder hip dude singer of 'save tonight', unfortunately eagle eye didn't 'save any money' and is now working in a checkers factory for petty cash. called eagle eye due to the fact he has glaucoma and its made his eyes shrink.

EEC "can i have a payrise?"
Boss Checker "what? get bent!
EEC "what if i sing a song?"
BC "bugger off"

by failure33object April 24, 2005

phil margera

Father of Bam and Jess Margera, husband to April and brother of Don Vito. Often woken abruptly by Bam and his crew. Duties include Elvis impersonator, punchbag, budding rockstar. Unbelievably unphased by his son's antics Phil is the epitomy of cool.

Jeez Bam what are you doing now?
-everytime Bam and the boys screw something up

by failure33object March 26, 2005

kingage

word commonly used in checkers when one player reaches his/her opponents side of the board, resulting in a crown being placed atop the successful checker. more often than not, kings are keen to free any P.o.W's or will hop around the board in a wild frenzy.

"that kingage is gonna result in a one-checker kill frenzy!"

by failure33object April 20, 2005

marc bolan

a 20th century superstar, glam rock elfin legend and all-round cool dude with corkscrew hair. main man of t rex, one of the best bands ever in the world, singing songs about wizards, pixies and dancing. died when his mini was driven into a tree by his tit of a fiance/wife.

"sat with a cat, on your head alone at last, you cry with a sigh, resurrecting all your past,
life's an elevator, it goes up and down,
life's an elevator, can't you dig the sound,
swift is the kill, shadows fill the empty walls, wild is the word, that engulfs love's sacred halls,
life's an elevator, it goes up and down,
life's an elevator, can't you dig the sound,
scenes from your past spread, before the flaming dawn, have faith in the hearts of the world they're rocking on,
life's an elevator, it goes up and down,
life's an elevator, can't you dig the sound"
LIFE'S AN ELEVATOR BY MARC BOLAN

by failure33object April 24, 2005