failure33object's definitions

henry the 8th

a man of wealth and taste. was married to more people than he could count. so he killed each one of them. killed more people than AIDS ever will. owner of a particularly cool beard, also created the song greensleeves and was a founding father of the UCHaI (union of checkers heroes and icons). would have been a big fan of kfc popcorn chicken

Henry - "oi, peasant, where's moi woif?"
Peasant - "i don't know sir..."
Henry - "HANG THIS FOOL!"
Aide - "sir he didn't commit a crime."
Henry "GET BENT!! YOU DIE TOO!!!"

by failure33object April 24, 2005

kfc popcorn chicken

the chosen gastronomic delight of checkers players the world over. although saint jackolas will claim responsibility, colonel sanders invented this delicacy in 1867, on the checkers battlefield.

"the colonal has outdone himself with this addictive and health damaging product...top draw fast food" - Rob McLean, checkers hero and popcorn chicken addict

by failure33object June 16, 2006

nut pie

an ancient foodstuff invented by aborigines. they would gather a variety of nuts from the forest and cook them in a light pastry. the sort of thing Ray Mears might enjoy making. in some cases the aborigines would roll the nuts up in a leaf and light it, thus creating a nut cigar.

Ray Mears: "what are you doing there?"
Aborigine 1: "gathering nuts for a nut pie."
RM to camera: "he says he's gathering nuts, for a nut pie."
Aborigine 2: "sod off, Ray."

by failure33object April 18, 2005

electtrivia

a form of musical escapism invented by the mystery that is Jethry Benadine. consists of off-key drum beats and severe battering of guitars. overexposure will result in blindness and/or deafness.

electtrivia - a big deathly cocktail of conflicting noise.

by failure33object April 30, 2005

jethry benadine

jethry benadine is a legend in the true sense of the meaning. he is known as the man responsible for putting the 5th string on the banjo and is also credited with creating fruity penny chews. he was born under the zodiac sign scorpio in 1908 in a bath.

"jethry benadine is a genius for coming up with that 5th string idea" - tom jones
"jethry where have you gone" - song by banjo-kazooie

by failure33object April 16, 2005