failure33object's definitions

invitre

a popular alternative to the boring "invite", this is often used to lure someone into a game of checkers as they are powerless to resist its Pied Piper-like effect. created by Rob McLean on a rainy day.

"if there is a better alternative to invite, i'd like to see it!" - Rob McLean

by failure33object April 26, 2005

winston churchill

the man! ceegar-chomping, country-beating, Hitler-dominating badass! the man who saved Britain from a future of camp haircuts and rotten food. and possible buggery. a very tough man who could stand up to anyone and scare them off.

the scene: a dinner party.
*Winston C farts loudly*
Aggrieved Gent: "How dare you pass wind in front of my wife!"
Winst: "I'm sorry, I didn't know it was her turn."

by failure33object April 24, 2005

cool spot

a plastic drinks-container lid who was the star of several video games in the early 90's. Cool Spot's main pleasure in life was hanging out at the beach and freeing his friends from cages. notable adventures include a trip to Hollywood and his trip to a drug rehab clinic. it is debatable as to whether Cool Spot is:
(a) a drink-container lid
(b) a checker
(c) a tiddly wink

"the reddest plastic drink container lid to get his own video game" Rob McLean, Cool Spot fanatic

by failure33object April 25, 2005

the alcove

the best place in the universe. frequented daily for two whole years by Rob McLean and Jim Davies. a place of indescribable awesomeness, The Alcove is a small step, housed by a concrete alcove, perfectly built never to be tainted by sunlight.

"the coldest stone on earth"
"the only place where phil tranters filthy hands cannot reach in the grounds of hereford sixth form" - Rob McLean

by failure33object April 22, 2005

kraken

a huge killer dragon beast that lives in the sea, possibly Godzilla's father. according to folklore the kraken was originally someones pet gecko and that person angered the God's by peeing in the village fountain, so Zeus made his pet gecko grow to around 60 metres high and ordered it to kill him. alternate sources say it got trapped in a greenhouse. starred in the film "Clash Of The Titans".

The Kraken: "WRAAAARGH!"
Perseus: "leave me alone you big spastic lizard!"
The Kraken: "BY ORDER OF ZEUS I MUST KILL!!"
*Perseus stabs the Kraken in the eye*
The Kraken: "OOOW! YOU LITTLE SOD!"

by failure33object April 26, 2005

jethry benadine

jethry benadine is a legend in the true sense of the meaning. he is known as the man responsible for putting the 5th string on the banjo and is also credited with creating fruity penny chews. he was born under the zodiac sign scorpio in 1908 in a bath.

"jethry benadine is a genius for coming up with that 5th string idea" - tom jones
"jethry where have you gone" - song by banjo-kazooie

by failure33object April 16, 2005

checkers

a game of epic, almost war-like, proportions. much more than moving a few little pieces around a board... this is the game of champions. notable features of the game include: Saint Jackolas, kingage and an abundance of references to being "on", like Donkey Kong. preferred past-time of Mr.T, William Shatner and the late Barry White.

"simply the greatest game ever created, god outdid himself with this creation" -Rob McLean, checkers hero, close friend of David Dickinson and Saint Jackolas hater

by failure33object April 26, 2005