danglyballzjohn's definitions

Bear Snatch

A vagina that is so hairy you fear it will be ripped off like a bear trap upon penetration.

I was so game to fuck until I saw her grizzled muff, I walked away because I thought her bear snatch would rip my dick off.

by danglyballzjohn November 24, 2018

Gone monk

Completely abstaining from all sexual activity, including masturbating or any physical contact

He's gone monk, won't even go on a date after his last relationship

by danglyballzjohn September 2, 2023

vanilla long john

A penis covered in ejaculate.

I busted such a large nut that my dong has jizzum frosting all along the shaft, a vanilla long john!!

by danglyballzjohn January 22, 2017

frumpty dumpty

Someone who is extremely frumpy.

Frumpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Frumpty Dumpty had no style at all.

by danglyballzjohn April 3, 2016

monkey tickle

The nervous sensation felt in the balls when afraid of falling or of heights, often experienced when standing on the edge of a building or riding a roller coaster.

When we stood on the observer box in the Willis Tower, I could really feel the monkey tickle looking down.

by danglyballzjohn February 5, 2017

flesh pants

A term used to describe when someone is naked from the waist down.

Bob: "Hey Bill, put some pants on!"
Bill: "I've got pants on."
Bob: "Really? Then those are the ugliest pair of flesh pants I've ever seen."

by danglyballzjohn May 19, 2018

solo blumpkin

Masturbating while taking a shit

Friend: "Hey Bill, you wanna play some basketball?"
Bill: "I would, but I'm kinda constipated and horny so I'll go for a solo blumpkin."

by danglyballzjohn June 9, 2015