cokemidget's definitions

Argo

A word meant to indicate a quick escape. Could be used as a verb or a noun.

Person 1: I totally can't afford this bar tab.

Person 2: Time to argo out of here?
Person 1: Time to argo THE FUCK out of here .

by Cokemidget April 9, 2022

nickles

A drinking/campfire game in which the participant throws a 5 cent coin over the fence in order to hit a neighbouring house, shed, car, or any other object. The winner is judged by the length of time the nickel takes to hit something, as well as the loudness of the sound the coin makes. The game is best played after sundown, and bonus points are awarded when the owner of the house being hit turns on the lights to see what the noise was all about.

This game can also be played with other denominations such as quarters, but nickles are usually picked for both their relatively large size as well as their low value, providing the best bang for the buck.

"Hey, what do you chumps want to do tonight?"

"Let's get really drunk and play nickles".

by cokemidget January 3, 2008

chumped

Getting dumped for a chump. It's when you're friends with some chick who you hang out with or whatever, who then starts dating some other chump and never talks to you ever again. This leaves you sitting there on a cold leather couch in your underwear playing Wii bowling, drinking stale MGD, and wondering where the hell your friends are. Then after thinking about it, you come to two logical conclusions:

1. The chick totally had a thing for you. Now that she has a boyfriend, she no longer has use for any other guys she wanted to bang. But in the end, you ended up on top because of #2 (see below):
2. The guy she's dating is totally gay and will probably end up beating her out of frustration.

Hey, you handsome hunk of man meat, weren't you supposed to hang out with Helga tonight?

No, she totally chumped me.

by cokemidget June 23, 2008

suburban tourist

A douchebag who drives around the suburbs at half the legal speed limit, looking at houses that he and his stuck up yuppie wife would like to purchase. Suburban tourists usually travel in groups of twos or threes in late model Dodge Caravans or VW Jettas, and have a tendency to stop randomly to point and discuss the latest shade of any butt-ugly pastel coloured siding they might encounter. They also love to stare at you when you're mowing the lawn, as they seem to think their stares and finger pointing are invisible to anyone outside their car.

I was late coming home for dinner today. There was a hoard of suburban tourists driving down Rutherford Road. FUCK ME!

by cokemidget June 28, 2008

REI

A Relationship Experience Index (REI) is a number assigned to the length of one's longest relationship, which determines who else you can be with after the relationships ends. Basically you can only date people within your own REI.

REI Level 1: 0-1 years
REI Level 2: 2-5 years
REI Level 3: 6-10 years
REI Level 4: Over 10 years

Rick: Hey Consuella, wanna go out with me this friday?

Consuella: Sorry, I'm a REI Level 2 and you're only a Level 1. You KNOW that's not allowed!

Rick: It's ok, I'll just cry myself to sleep tonight.

by cokemidget September 14, 2012

pronger

Lying about the facts to make yourself feel better about being a weasel and dodging your responsibilities.

The word originates from the infamous hockey player Chris Pronger, who spreads the untrue rumours about irate Edmonton fans burning his furniture, including his baby's crib, after he asked to be traded from the Oilers. Although Pronger could not be reached for comment, it is assumed he was trying to divert attention from the fact that he asked to be traded from the Oilers after completing a measly one year of his five year contract.

I totally prongered about being sick today. I told my boss I had massive diarrhea, but in fact I just hate my job and didn't feel like going.

by cokemidget January 21, 2008

economy leech

An individual who leaves one region to profit from the economic prosperity of another region. Generally, economy leeches have no marketable skills and and therefore contribute very little to the well being of their new environment. They arrive in droves and their presence usually results in a steep increase in rent prices. Economy leeches usually appear disoriented in traffic, and can be identified by their out-of-province license plates and their constant whining about social problems, which they themselves have caused.

In Alberta, economy leeches are sometimes called Buffalo Hunters, in reference to the 19th European settlers who raped and pillaged the bison population of the prairie provinces for their precious hides.

I was totally late to work today. I was driving behind some newfie economy leech who drove 20 under the limit because he didn't know where he was going.

by cokemidget January 15, 2008