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captain poopypants's definitions

gentlemen....

a way to let everyone know that what comes next will make you shit your pants. It is an attention grabber, and it shows that the shit has just hit the fan.
who is that guy? Gentlemen, Wade garrett! Holy shit! Exactly right!
by captain poopypants November 27, 2004
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eye candy

a kick ass hair band featuring old, fat, balding men in their early 40's. They usually appear in ripped denim shorts, tank tops or belly shirts, and cowboy boots. Their vocals suck, but they look good. Formally in such bands as Silver Mullet and Piledriver. It is a supergroup that was formed when the high profile stars of Silver Mullet and Piledriver both broke up in the late 1990's. Featuring hit singles such as, Friends Forever, Don't Throw Stones, Gimme Back my mullets, Look at us we're eye candy, take a picture and stop staring, and there #1 single Mackin on girls down at Rizzo's saloon
I would do anything for two tickets to the Eye Candy concert, and I mean anything
by captain poopypants November 29, 2004
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I sure ain't gonna show ya my dick

A comeback during an argument or fight. Used to show who is the boss.
Come on dickless. I sure ain't gonna show ya my dick.
by captain poopypants November 12, 2004
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vodka rocks

a slang term used to describe a smokin hot girl at a saloon or tavern.
Hey..Vodka Rocks, what'ya say you and me get nipple to nipple?
by captain poopypants November 19, 2004
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You're too stupid to have a good time!

A direct insult, a challenge to fight. A way to alienate or provoke Wesleys men.
Sorry we're closed. Then what are all these people doing here? Drinking and having a good time... Thats why we're here. You're too stupid to have a good time!
by captain poopypants November 12, 2004
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moosehead

A man who wears too much styling moose in his hair. A way to start a fight outside, not inside, a club. usually a pompous guy who has big hair, someone you thought would be "bigger"
Come on, I've always wanted to try you. Come on moosehead. Dickhead.
by captain poopypants November 12, 2004
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there's always barber college

a smart ass statement that lets the recipient know that you do not give a shit about their future. They do not have the right temperment for the trade, and you have made the decision to terminate them.
Morgan, you're out of here. What the fuck are you talkin about? You don't have the right temperment for the trade. What the fuck am I supposed to do? Theres always barber college.
by captain poopypants November 19, 2004
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