18 definitions by aldwardo

The most annoying women on the face of the earth only rivaling Sarah Jessica Parker, Ellen Degeneres, and Rosie O' Donnell. She's not funny and her career sucks. People like her and Jenny Jones are the reason there is war in the middle east.

She also looks like a tranny on crack.
Kathy Griffin sucks and I want to nail her to the fucking cross.
by aldwardo January 27, 2007
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The best sidescrolling series ever. This game proves you don't need 32 km of viewing distance and radioactive HDR on the real-time foilage to be fun. This series revolves around a vampire hunter defeating dracula. That's the basic premise, you go through Dracula's castle fighting zombies and creatures and all types of badass monsters. Tight control, badass weapons, deep gameplay with awesome moves, kickass sprite animations, one of the best soundtracks in videogame history. All of the games in this series kickass(excluding the dogshit 3D ones which have no right to bear the name Castlevania and Castlevania 2).

Some other series match it such as Super Mario Bros. and Metroid, but this game is the epitomy of what makes a videogame good.
My favorite one is Castlevania: Circle of the Moon on the gameboy advance.
by aldwardo October 25, 2006
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A relatively unknown but talented actor. His most famous role is Assistant Director Walter Skinner on the The X-Files. Most of his roles include playing some type of law enforcement officer. I think he is the best character on The X-Files.
by aldwardo October 29, 2006
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A site where the only thing worth a damn is the back button on your browser. It's basically Michael Moore's wetdream in the form of a webpage.
Going to shoutwire is about as painful as watching your only infant child choke to death.
by aldwardo November 3, 2006
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A year that will surely kick ass for video games.
2007: Unreal III, Halo 3, Metal Gear Solid 4, Super Smash Brothers: Brawl, WoW: Burning Crusade, Mario Galaxy, Crysis, Metroid Prime: Corruption, Legend of Zelda: The Phantom Hourglass, GRAW 2, Disaster: Day of Crisis, Project HAMMER, Resident Evil, Devil May Cry 4, God of War 2, STALKER: Shadow of Chernobyl, Bioshock, SPORE, Hellgate: London, Mass Effect, GTA IV, SSX Blur, Alan Wake, Killzone 2, Assasins Creed, GOD TOO MANY TO FUCKING NAME.
by aldwardo February 1, 2007
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One of the greatest video game series of this generation. Splinter Cell revolves around you (Sam Fisher) going on espionage missions for the NSA. The actually stories are a bit complicated I don't even stand all of it myself but I don't play games for stories.

Unlike most game series, this one gets better with each release. Comparing it to MGS is just silly, they are two amazing franchises.

Chaos Theory (3rd of the series, not counting the shitty handheld versions) is one of my favorite games ever. It eliminates all the trial and error of the first two and really makes it much more enjoyable(I've beaten it 7 times already). It's so flexible and flat out amazing in terms of everything that makes a game good. Good graphics, amazing soundtrack, deep and flexible gameplay, and replayiblity. Don't get me started on how amazing the multiplayer is because words don't do it justice. It's so genious yet so underrated.
Splinter Cell games so far:

Splinter Cell
Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow
Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory
Splinter Cell: Double Agent

The new one (Double Agent) is due out very soon. It will own your soul.
by aldwardo October 13, 2006
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The stupidest, most nonsensical "theory" ever. If it's a joke it isn't funny.

"Anything that can go wrong, will." What the fuck does that mean? I mean I wake up every morning and drive to work in my piece of shit car. I haven't gotten into an accident and my car has never broke down. There you have it I beat the stupid theory.

One of the most common examples that I hear is when stuck in traffic the other lanes around you will move faster than the lane you're in. What? What about the people in the other lanes, why doesn't this bullshit law apply to them? I could name some more examples but frankly it isn't worth it.
by aldwardo November 3, 2006
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