Yopmail User's definitions

Printing Press

This sex act requires that you abduct three little girls and strip them naked in your basement. You must then break their knees with a sledgehammer, toss the girls aside, create a mixture of laxatives and your bodily fluids (especially cum and vomit), and let it blend for ten minutes. During these ten minutes, you are to stand a few meters from your desired girl, charge towards her, ram your cock (you can use a spiked dildo, albeit not necessary) up her ass (cunts and mouths are acceptable), and repeat for each girl until the blending finishes. Feed one of the girls your concoction and, with a staple gun, connect the girls' mouths to each other's asses so that they form an endless human centipede. After some time, collect some of their shit and use it to spell out a phrase of your choice. Smear the shit on their faces afterwards and beat off on their backs and faces.

Vomit on a printing press for bonus points.

by Yopmail User August 27, 2023

Quizizz

Kahoot for poor people.

If nobody gives Quizizz Inc. a lecture on plagiarism, I'll do it myself!

by Yopmail User November 13, 2022

Diet Coke and Mentos

Something half of my definitions involve. See also sex.

The next time you enter a McDonald's restaurant, snatch a kid from his parents, take him to the kitchen, and shove some Diet Coke and Mentos up his ass!

by Yopmail User October 21, 2022

Custer's Revenge

A fun, wholesome Atari 2600 game for the whole family. Developed by Mystique in 1982, you control General George Armstrong Custer and dodge a bunch of arrows to score with a Native American woman. If you want to see what your friends do all the time, this is the game for you.

It's time for Custer's Revenge. You're the native. Enjoy penetration.

by Yopmail User November 23, 2022

Blossom

1. To pour Diet Coke and Mentos, in that order, down a girl's vagina. This will cause the formation of a soda geyser in her uterus and vagina, which will fuck up her reproductive system and launch soda the fuck out of her vagina. (verb)

2. The Powerpuff Girl of the same name, and leader of the trio. Wears a red bow to assert dominance. (noun)

1.
Guy 1: I gonna blossom (pours Diet Coke and Mentos down girl's vagina)
Girl 1: *screams in agony* THAT HURTS WHAT THE FUCK (The soda geyser in her vagina drenches Guy 1)
Guy 1: *masturbating in Girl 1's mouth*
(Girl 1 has her period, adding blood to the geyser. She then faints)
Guy 1: *takes picture of Girl 1's fucked-up vagina*

2. No example needed

by Yopmail User June 26, 2022

your dick

No woman in a thousand-mile radius would ever want to suck it.

You'd have to be dumber than Joe Biden to look this shit up on Urban Dictionary. Your dick will remain small either way, dumbass.

by Yopmail User November 24, 2022

Dib

(noun) A nickname for any person who is spouting bullshit and/or making irrational claims. Can also be used to describe someone who disagrees with you. Named after the Invader Zim character of the same name.

Idiot: Biden is a good president!
Rational person: Shut up, Dib.

by Yopmail User August 30, 2022