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Definitions by WhoaTimesTwo

reading my email 

One of several innocent-sounding responses which can be used by regular porn viewers when their parents/spouse(s) ask them what they're doing on the computer.
Mom: What're you doing?
Juan: Reading my email.
Mom: Oh cool. Can I read mine too?
Dad: Uh no honey, come back later...this is an important email. We'll be done in about an hour.
The children of a hillbilly farmer whose actual produce failed during the year. He takes them to fairs to enter into contests instead of actual food, though they don't taste nearly as well. They usually can succeed well if entered as yams or squash. Poor kids have to live with that for the rest of their lives.
Jim Bob: Mah corns dinn't grow so wyell tis yar, so I took my two gyurls Wynona and Edbert to the fair! Hyuck. They won the squarsh contest!
crops by WhoaTimesTwo March 29, 2004

tail over the fence 

When you just barely escape an area after some serious shiz goes down. Usually involves fleeing from incoming cops, or somebody's really strong mother.
My buddies and I lit fire to Mrs. Lindon's rose beds while she was home. I got my tail over the fence, but Rico and Hugh got sodomized by a mop handle.
The ultimate form of a stupid, idiotic, moron. Someone who is just so dumb that you had to make up a word to describe them, because no other word did them justice.
Jimmy's a freakin' wagnard. He jizzed in my urine sample and then put bacon bits in it.
wagnard by WhoaTimesTwo March 29, 2004

plowing new ground 

1. When the prostitutes in town get so overloaded with STDs that it becomes visible via fungus growth, and you are forced to migrate to another part of the city to find ones with a health rating of at least 23%.

2. When a straight person turns gay, or vice versa.
1. I'm gonna start plowing new ground around 4th street tonight man. Last night one of the regulars on 3rd blew up a car with her yeast infection.

2. Fred's hanging around the women's section in Kmart for a different reason since he's turned straight. He's plowing new ground now.
The opposite of a wagnard. To be totally balls to the wall awesome. Usually a compliment reserved for a very special occasion, such as when someone saves your life or the dude at Dairy Queen gives you the most awesome non-melted-cheese cheeseburger you have ever experienced.
1. Dude you just saved my life, you are totally the drangaw!

2. OMG U R TEH AWESOME!!!111!!
drangaw by WhoaTimesTwo March 29, 2004