Tuna Wanda's definitions

Saturday Night Special

What I, and all sensible ladies, carry to discourage or stop attacks by hoodlums.

Nobody ever raped a thirty-eight. That's why I pack a Saturday Night Special.

by Tuna Wanda January 26, 2007

bum wad

Toilet paper. Ass wipe. Bumf. Bumfodder. Mountain money.

Oh sweetheart, we're out of bum wad in here. Would you please fetch me a roll?

by Tuna Wanda May 26, 2005

shyster

The proper name for an attorney or a lawyer. A money-grubbing scoundrel who tries to save subhuman scum from execution, or who sues honest people who are trying to do their jobs.

It's very hard to win a lawsuit against you when you're against a big corporation with plenty of shysters.

by Tuna Wanda May 30, 2005

day care brat

The offspring of a yuppie and a soccer mom, who grows up in a day care center without learning discipline, manners, or courtesy.

That Madison is a real day care brat. All she does is whine and demand candy.

by Tuna Wanda May 22, 2005

church key

A beer can opener. Unfortunately, use of this instrument has declined since the pop top appeared in the mid 1960s.

Lolly and Harriet are bringing the beer. Don't forget to bring a church key.

by Tuna Wanda May 22, 2005

dog

A canine pet owned by a person for fun and companionship. It is fed, loved, and cared for.

A canine working partner owned by a rancher to help herd animals. It is fed, loved, and cared for.

An animal companion who shares living space with a yuppie or a dink couple. It is spoiled rotton and treated far better than many people. It serves in lieu of a child, is never disciplined, and is the favorite topic of conversation.

Samantha and her dog walk along the river each day.

by Tuna Wanda May 14, 2005

Thunder Buns

An affectionate name for a lady or gentleman who lets a great many binderfenders and dead badgers.

A prodigious farter.

Who do you have for third period English?

Mrs. Sweeney.

Oh, wow, you have Old Thunder Buns? I wish I was in there with you! It's gonna be a gas!

by Tuna Wanda May 30, 2005