Townsman's definitions

mattress lap

An bountifully haired pubic region, usually on a female, with the appearance of a part stuffed mattress.

Uncommon due to the exponential growth of styled pubic depilation amongst the teen and twenty something demographic.

Wow look at that!!

Ya think it's a merkin?

Mebbe, but it is a she is a true Mattress Lap

by Townsman July 28, 2016

Top Gear

A motoring version of Last of the Summer Wine for petrol heads.

Three mid-life guys pratting about and having a ball in expensive motorcars, usually with no definable reason but with amusing results. Moreso with Top Gear challenges.

Probably the most entertaining programme on the BBC.

Did you see Top Gear?

Yeah, that Zonda is wicked.

by Townsman September 27, 2014

quarter-cup

An open cup bra designed to permit maximum exposure of the breast whilst providing sufficient padding and support the lower and under breast area to give all day comfort. Ideal for presenting a braless look to the smaller breast under blouses and tops etc.

Tina knew her quarter-cup bra made her bee-sting boobies look great.

Hey man is she or isn't she?

Dunno Sure look good with those pokies on show!

Thought so...she is wearing a quarter-cup bra!

Ellen knew even tiny titties like to be shown off her quarter-cupo bra did that just fine

by Townsman December 30, 2014

Mushroomhead

Most usually the overly large size of a glans of a penis relative to its shaft.

Usually a mushroomhead will require circumcision of the penis to allow painfree erections around puberty.

Dave loved the attention his mushroomhead gained him at the nude beach.

Andy and Luke spent hours studying Bob's mushroomhead.

Jackie found Sam's mushroomhead almost too much for one girl's capacity, but it was so worth it!

by Townsman December 30, 2014