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The Gonzo Lecture's definitions

groupwork

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A learning strategy devised by academics to divert attention from themselves and their own activities, cut down on teaching time and cause the maximum amount of stress and discomfort to their students. Groupwork involves the administration of complex, indecipherable assessment tasks which students are left to spend long hours together in each others' company to figure out leading often to short periods of abusive conflict and sometimes even longer periods of fornication and even marriage.
Jemima: Professor, can you please answer me a question about our assignment?

Professor: No I can't. You see, it's groupwork. You have to figure it out together with your team mates. Why not go and ask Brad to help you. He looks like he'd be happy to straighten you out. I have to go now and see if that infernal coffee bar is open yet.
by The Gonzo Lecture March 25, 2010
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Managementspeak for "no you can't have one".
Employee: can I have another cupboard to store things in my office?

Manager: we are presently seeking to "par down" the amount of storage in this particular area.
by The Gonzo Lecture March 11, 2010
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throw under the bus

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To actually throw somebody under a moving bus.
Example 1
I was feeling really upset with my colleague, so I threw her under a bus. This was my fulfilment of a lifetime urge to actually practice the phenomenon to "throw under the bus".

Example 2
The driver confronted me and asked "what the fuck did you throw her under my bus for?"
by The Gonzo Lecture March 10, 2010
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Intolerance

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A justifiable reaction to all the assholes out there.
"My God Bill, all those assholes out there just fill me with unbearable yet justified intolerance."
by The Gonzo Lecture March 10, 2010
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A practice developed on the London railway system by women to gain preferntial seating during rush hour periods. It involves confronting male passengers and asking them for their seat on the grounds that they are pregnant.
Female passenger: "can I please have your seat. I'm pregnant." (Whole carriage stares at man)

Male pssenger: "stop with yer foetus jacking, miss. I'm gonna need to see a copy of the ultrasound photo"
by The Gonzo Lecture March 9, 2010
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Avatared

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Refers to being stepped over and ignored with respect to one's rightful accolades. It's origin stems from the audacious treatment of the movie Avatar by the Oscar's Award committee in the 2010 ceremony when it picked up only 3 production related awards and lost out to another, much less grossing movie called Hurt Locker.
Dude 1: I can't understand why I never get promoted at work.

Dude 2: That's because you keep gettin Avatared.
by The Gonzo Lecture March 8, 2010
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Blingford

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A slang name used to generically describe the suburbs to the east of London, including Essex. The suffix "-ford" denotes that such towns tend to be situated on a river, often the Thames. Such suburbs including Ilford, Stratford, Romford, etc. can therefore be referred to generally without causing direct offense to their residents. The prefix "Bling" refers to the tendency of some of these residents to wear flashy, or gaudy jewellery, possibly implying that they are chavs.
Example 1:

Sociologist: As we can see from this picture, these two people are chavs, sitting in a McDonald's restaurant in Blingford. They are denoted by their tracksuits, gaudy jewellery and next tattoos.

Example 2:

"That's coz you's a tasteless, chavvy, Blingford mutherfucker, innit! Aight?"
by The Gonzo Lecture March 7, 2010
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