The Captain's definitions

scrotal highway

A route seldom traveled.

US Highway 69.

Intersects with the Bungchute expressway.

She drove on down the old scrotal highway, but really ran out of steam when it came to the ballsack turnpike

by The Captain December 20, 2003

Snowy Toothbrush

When you jiz on someones toothbrush and the person uses it without knowing.

I just gave Scion Face a Snowy Toothbrush

by The Captain January 24, 2005

carmex

something that is sweet to put on your eyelids and feels really cool

dude i was drunk last night and i put carmex on my eyelids, it was awesome

by the captain February 5, 2005

Captain Crunch

Some bunk ass weed sold by some cracker jack ass niggas usually contains seeds stems leaves and is dry and crunchy know to cause headaches

The homie: yo this nigga Nathan was tryna sell me some captain crunch it was full of seeds and hedge clippings it fell apart right when i touched it.
ME: Haha the nigga was prolly trying to scrape up some money for a decent hair cut for once haha.

by THE CAPTAIN January 6, 2014

Mooseka

pirate

Oh, no! A shipful of Moosekas!

by The Captain October 12, 2003

beautifuck

It’s when you fuck a really gorgeous girl for no apparent reason. Usually happens to a mediocre to semi good-looking male with a hot casual friend or a random from the bar. Ugly people may need the assistance of alcohol or roofies, and in most case that’s illegal.

One thing lead to another, then bam, another beautifuck.

by the captain March 30, 2005

snatch gristle

The labia minora, or inner lips, of the vagina; especially those that protrude beyond the labia majora, or outer lips, of the vagina and resemble the tough elastic cartilage of meat.

Damn! I almost choked on that bitch's snatch gristle!!!

by The Captain January 22, 2004