Telephony's definitions

torqued off

Means the same thing as ticked off, pissed off, teed off, etc. (e.g. extremely angry)

Melanie got very torqued off when she discovered that her Facebook account had been hacked and subsequently altered to replace her photograph with one of a dead giraffe.

by Telephony June 23, 2011

hum my rod

Another term for "suck my dick".

{Joe & Josh are at the baseball stadium; Joe has the "cheap seats"}

Josh: Hey Joe, how's the weather up in the nosebleed section?
Joe: HUM MY ROD Josh!!!

by Telephony June 20, 2011

carpet pig

Young children; offspring, kids, spawn, etc.

Hey Helen?
How's that little carpet pig of yours doing?
Has he gotten into any mischief lately?

by Telephony June 2, 2011

zax

Computer-generated music.

That awsome zax in the Dominator loader for the Commodore 64 computer was written by Matt Gray.

by Telephony May 23, 2011

NSFYE

An acronym that stands for "Not Safe For Your Ears".

As one example, you may use this acronym on YouTube when your video contains an audio (sound) component that some viewers may find distasteful, such as heavy metal music like Anthrax or Megadeth.

{in the YouTube description of a video I made and uploaded myself}:

*NSFYE* (Not Safe For Your Ears). A video of the Syma S107G R/C Coaxial Helicopter flying in my room, set to another Anthrax song.
Abort this video immediately if you find thrash metal music distasteful.

That music you hear is the song "Howling Furies" by Anthrax. This heli is not sound-sensitive; the audio may safely be ignored or even muted if it pisses you off.

by Telephony May 18, 2011

pissblanket

A plastic mattress protector; used to prevent a mattress from becoming wrecked if somebody has enuresis (if they piss the bed). They are often found on beds at group homes and similar facilities.

Robbins then thinks about the pissblankets on every bed in the joint, so he rips the pissblanket off of one of the beds, goes around and unscrews all of the light bulbs he can get to, pours the generous helping of light bulbs into the pissblanket (approx. 24 bulbs), gathers up the edges, and whirls the bulging pissblanket over his head -- striking the wall with it a number of times until he is absolutely, positively, 100% certain that all of the bulbs inside are busted. He then crams the pissblanket and its cargo of broken bulbs into a nearby wastepaperbasket.

by Telephony April 16, 2011

shampotty

The same thing as shampee and shampiddle; that is, a bottle of shampoo that's been wrecked because some dillhole uranated into it.

John Grass uranated into bottles of shampoo at the Juneau Receiving Home in the very early-1980s, thus converting them into shampotty and subsequently earning the nickname "The Shampoo Killer".

by Telephony March 20, 2011