Telephony's definitions

public enema number one

Very similar to "public enemy number one"; perhaps a little worse (how much worse can it get?!?)

Jayden is public enema number one for stealing the food from the foodbank and throwing it into a burning dipsty dumpster!!! Man, what a class A-1 prick!!!

by Telephony January 24, 2011

plastic cat toliet

An alternate phrase that is simply another way of saying "litterbox".

Called the "plastic cat toliet" because litterboxes are generally made of plastic and they have but one function: a cat pisses & shits into it -- thus making it a toliet for cats.

Craig, it's time to clean out the plastic cat toliet; it's getting awfully full!!!

by Telephony December 27, 2011

broken

When referring to a pet cat or dog that's been "fixed", they're actually broken. I mean, think about it...when a pet has its cunt cut out or has its nads chopped off, it is no longer capable of doing something that it was rather easily able to before -- that is, make kittens or puppies!

Yeah, Nikki has been broken; she got spayed approx. nine years ago and can no longer have little baby kitties.

by Telephony June 6, 2015

On the Rag Again

A phoney-bologna fake made up song, sung to the Willy Nelson song, "On the Road Again".

♪On the rag again!♪
♪I just can't wait to go on the rag again!!♪

♪The life I love is making music with my (menstrual) pads♪
♪And I can't wait to go on the rag again!!!♪

♪On the rag again,♪
♪See those bloody tampons swirling down the toliet!♪

♪She's a fucked-up friend♪
♪Keeps insisting that those panty liners keep coming...keep coming!♪

♪On the rag again,♪
♪I just can't wait to go on the rag again,♪
♪The life I love is making music with the head,♪
♪And I can't wait to go on the rag again!!!♪

by Telephony July 28, 2016

Sataned eggs

They're like Deviled eggs, but when secretly made with copious amounts of hot sauce they become hellishly, unbearably hot. Truly, they've become SATANED EGGS!

Holy shit Daniel! These aren't Deviled eggs, they're Sataned eggs! PASS ME THE MILK, HURRY!!!

by Telephony February 21, 2018

Fell heezes over

Used if you don't have the balls to say, "Hell freezes over". Also it can be used on fora or BBSs when the onboard censor nukes the word Hell.

Snow in Houston? When Fell heezes over!

by Telephony December 12, 2017

synthetic whistling

Not all dissimilar to synthetic clapping, synthetic birds, synthetic finger popping, etc.
It is the sound of human whistling created solely by synthesizer hardware or computer software synthesis. Most frequently heard on TV commercials for various & sundry household products; especiall.

No actual lips are injured or otherwise harmed when synthetic whistling is employed.

The Take Control margarine advertisement from the turn of the century had this horrid synthetic whistling in it. Made me want to throw a large tub of frozen Gold & Soft margarine right through my TV set's boob tube and then suck up all of the glass with a bagged upright vaccume cleaner so that the cat doesn't cut her paws on it! :-(

by Telephony May 8, 2015