Telephony's definitions

Tweety Turd

Another name for that pitiful excuse for a used douche president Donald Trump.

I see that Tweety Turd now wants to create a Space Force just so that he can waste more of OUR money. Your tax dollars at work here folks.

by Telephony August 11, 2018

THE FV¢K?

An abbreviated form of what the fuck? with some letters of the word fuck replaced in order to circumvent the onboard censors found in many online BBS programs (forums or even fora if you really want to be an ass about it).

{CFrom a YouTube description of a drone flight that has Slayer music overlaid upon it}

THE FV¢K?
Slayer is neither *SWEET* nor *RELAXING!!!* ;-)
It's like box jellyfish venom to the ears of many!!! :-O

by Telephony July 1, 2019

goat the tolet

This is how some people (esp. elderly women) pronounce the phrase, "go to the toliet".

{Norm}: Cummon Helen, let's go!
{Helen}: Hang on a moment Norm, I need to goat the tolet before we leave.

by Telephony July 19, 2016

phoney-bologna

Pronounced "fō'nē-bu-lō'nē".
How some people spell the phrase, "phony-baloney" -- which means nonsensical and/or foolish

{From a website featuring staged "battles" between TV commercial mascots}:

That goddamn sodding phoney-bologna fake CGI "General" gets out of the gates first because that goddamn sodding phoney-bologna fake Honey Nut Cheerios® Bee is trapped in the cereal cabinet by the family cat which has decided that now would be a good time to spray the cabinet doors.

by Telephony March 4, 2015

Master Bator

A Master Bator is somebody who, because of the sheer number of times they have masturbated (choked the chicken, administered corporal punishment to a primate {spanked the monkey}, jacked off, beat off, jerked off, beat their meat, whacked off, played pocket pool, wanked off, etc.), has become an expert at it -- a true master masturbator (or Master Bator).

Works better when written or typed vs. when spoken.

Hozay hasn't gotten any tail in such a long time that he's become a true-to-life Master Bator!!!

by Telephony August 22, 2012

toliet Nazi

Some assclown who leaves only a couple of little pieces on the roll of bungwipe (just enough to cover the merferator) so that when you go to wipe, there isn't another roll and your fingers are subsequently besmudged with feces.

Son of a bitch motherfucker cocksucker! The last one that used the head was a toliet Nazi so I had to rip the roller towel down and wipe my bunghole off with that!

by Telephony December 31, 2013

pee water

In the Beavis and Butt-Head episode, "Buy Beer", this is how the clerk at the convenience store described The Edge non-alcoholic "beer" that Beavis & Butt-Head were purchasing.

{clerk} O, you guys are buying that pee water. I guess I can sell that crap to you.

by Telephony April 4, 2020