Tard Ferguson's definitions

Afterglide

When semen mixes with Astroglide to create a slimy, slippery substance.

"You gotta hand me a towel; I just came and this Afterglide is starting to get nasty."

by Tard Ferguson December 21, 2016

Twerkey

Being too sexual or promiscuous at Thanksgiving; Derived from "twerking" and "turkey".

"Deborah just broke up with her boyfriend and is getting all twerkey with her brother's friend over for Thanksgiving."

by Tard Ferguson November 23, 2017

Groggy Style

When you have sex half-asleep in some lazy, drowsy positions

"I started to fully wake up mid-thrust as I realized we were doing it groggy style in something somewhere between a slouched doggy style and a pooched up prone bone."

by Tard Ferguson September 8, 2020

The 4G Spot

The exact location in your home where you receive maximum mobile internet signal.

"Dana moaned with pleasure when she finally reached The 4G Spot when the WiFi went down."

by Tard Ferguson September 8, 2020

Red Nelson

When a man goes down on a woman during her period and he pops up with red facial hair.

"Hey man, I went down on Dana last night and she got scared when I came back up with a Red Nelson like I was coming back from war."

by Tard Ferguson July 1, 2019

Upfuck

Verb: To vomit during the act of intercourse, typically due to intoxication.

"I brought her upstairs at the party but halfway through she upfucked all over my new bedspread."

by Tard Ferguson July 13, 2018

Optimiscuous

Adjective Very hopeful of one's chances of getting laid; Optimistic and promiscuous.

"Randy must be feeling optimiscuous tonight if he's putting on his Sex Panther cologne before clubbing."

by Tard Ferguson July 1, 2019