Stouffer's definitions

beer coat

(extra credit for dogfish)n. the invisible force that keeps you warm, irrelevant of the external temperature, after consuming vast amounts of alchoholic liquid refreshment...see also beer goggles beer muffs mystery taxi beer scooter

"Are you coming with us in the taxi quentin? It's frightfully nippy out" "Fackin tennn notes for a fackin ride home,, fack offff,,my beer coat'll keep me warm you fackin toffs"

by stouffer March 4, 2003

beer goggles

The strange appearance of contact lenses which elevate previously obnoxious multi warted hogs, to the status of worth having a go on.

"feels warm, smells nice, female... Good start, FUCK Me, i must of been wearing my beer Goggles, hope i had brewers droop, cus i'd hate to see the offspring of this one".

by stouffer March 4, 2003

beer muffs

n. Mystical auratory additions which remove the necessity for sensiant conversation, and replace any understanding of people speaking to you with a garble mess, to which a derogatory response is necessitated by being stunningly pissed.

"Now, Frank, the oven's on and I'm off out with the girls; remember to feed the baby, check on the dinner and pay the car tax. Okay?"

"I FECKIN' LARVE YOOO, YOOO FACKIN' SEXY MINX"

by stouffer March 4, 2003

mystery taxi

(extra credit to Dogfish)n. similar to beer goggles in their effect on the morning after...but...when you're SO pissed you're SURE the woman you pulled last night was better looking than the bush hog you're lying next to when you wake up.

"holy shit...who the fuck are you? Bollocks, the pretty bird I pulled has been taken away by the Mystery Taxi. Please get out of my home"

by stouffer March 4, 2003

beer scooter

(extra credit to Dogfish)n. The remarkably quick method by which you get home after a night out on the piss, forcing you to remark you had an indelible mode of transport. (N.b. please also be aware of 'beer scooter with a puncture' which is a much slower form of transport, where you start out with speedy intentions; but spend the majority of the night dragging extra equipment attached to your legs)

"How did you get home Sebastian?"

"On a beer scooter"

"Oh"

by stouffer March 4, 2003

Spadge

Cum, spunk, gentleman's gel, valentines porridge.

"I filled the hairy cup with my spadge."

by Stouffer November 7, 2002

Guiche

The bit between a man's balls and his arse-hole.

After excretion, wipe from front to back, in order to avoid soiling of the guiche.

by Stouffer November 7, 2002