captain

The captain stood to attention, and entered the ladie's garden.
by Stouffer November 07, 2002
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spankathon

"I spanked for a long time. It was almost a Spankathon."
by Stouffer November 07, 2002
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plums

"If you've finished polishing the captain, you could have a suck on my plums"
by Stouffer November 07, 2002
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wizard's beard

n. also Gandalf's Beard. A very hairy meat pie, where the lips appear to continue down the legs a lot further than normal due to copious amounts of hair.
"It took me ages to reach the beef curtains; I had to wrestle with her wizard's beard first"
by Stouffer November 07, 2002
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beer scooter

(extra credit to Dogfish)n. The remarkably quick method by which you get home after a night out on the piss, forcing you to remark you had an indelible mode of transport. (N.b. please also be aware of 'beer scooter with a puncture' which is a much slower form of transport, where you start out with speedy intentions; but spend the majority of the night dragging extra equipment attached to your legs)
"How did you get home Sebastian?"

"On a beer scooter"

"Oh"
by stouffer March 04, 2003
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beer muffs

n. Mystical auratory additions which remove the necessity for sensiant conversation, and replace any understanding of people speaking to you with a garble mess, to which a derogatory response is necessitated by being stunningly pissed.
"Now, Frank, the oven's on and I'm off out with the girls; remember to feed the baby, check on the dinner and pay the car tax. Okay?"

"I FECKIN' LARVE YOOO, YOOO FACKIN' SEXY MINX"
by stouffer March 04, 2003
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