Stormsworder's definitions

Plushophile

Someone who has some kind of relationship with a plush (a furry toy). This person is not automatically perverted. They may just be unable to mix with other people socially. I'm sure there are some such people who do nothing more than look after their plush, care for it and cuddle it in front of the TV as though it was a person. On the other end of the scale, however, I think the 'inflatable doll' mentality is taken to severe extremes. Plushophiles who have full-sex relationships with their cuddly toys make a hole between the toy's legs and....well, you can guess the rest.

A certain type of plushophile seems to have misunderstood what 'taking a cuddly toy to bed' means.

by Stormsworder May 30, 2007

cd-r

CD-Rs are shiny disc-shaped objects which are sold in packs of about fifty. Once purchased, they can be used as bird-tables, wheels for large toy cars, hula-hoop rings your pet stick insect can use to keep itself in shape or things you can twirl around on top of sticks like in kids' variety shows. They can also be instrumental for your survival. If you are ever attacked by a T-Rex or other dangerous flesh-eating dinosaur, use the shiny surface of the CD-R to reflect the sunlight into its eyes. This will dazzle the beast and allow you valuable time to escape.

Note: CD-Rs are not for use with any kind of computer. If you put one in the disc drive and try to save any documents or data on it, you'll get a message telling you to insert a disc in the disc drive. That means the kind of disc which can be recorded on. These kinds of discs are currently on sale in most good stores on the planet Arcturus 3, or you can order them from Merlin's Mystic Store of Magic (ask for Harry).

by Stormsworder October 16, 2007

vagina

Female genetalia. Has an opening in which the male penis can be inserted. Is also the opening through which the baby leaves the female body. When sexually aroused, the vagina becomes moist allowing easier penetration.

Biology teacher: "Can anyone tell me the function of the vagina?"

Schoolboy sniggering from all around.

by Stormsworder April 3, 2007

halloween

This was once a pagan festival. Now it is an excuse for kids to come round in silly 'horror' costumes demanding money or sweets, sometimes throwing eggs at your house if you don't give them anything. Was also used as the title and setting for a series of films.

A couple of ghosties started fighting on halloween. They were pulled off by the ghoulies.

by Stormsworder February 4, 2007

troll

1: Somebody who, whether out of boredom, obnoxious tendencies or simply having no life to speak of, causes trouble on a website (eg: by starting arguments deliberately). I know of a website which had to be shut down after some jerk-off started deliberately causing a fuss and turning the various members against each other.

2: A mythological creature often used in fairy-tales such as 'The Three Billy-Goats Gruff'. Generally depicted as humanoid but ugly and sometimes with animal-like fangs, claws or horns.

There's a troll in an old computer game I found who is scared of teddy-bear heads with arms and legs. The great woos.

by Stormsworder March 11, 2007

england

A country which must rank as the biggest victim of racism in the modern world. Leonard Maltin gets on his high horse if Mickey Mouse so much as dresses up as a Native American and says 'how', nobody is allowed to mention that Abu Hamza is a twisted terrorist supporter and no-one's allowed to sing 'baa-baa-black-sheep'. And yet Hollywood is busy churning out so-called movies which are really one piece of anti-english racist propaganda after another. The latest, Braveheart, tells the 'true' story of how the heroic Scots beat the evil English murderers. Lol! It's not Mel Gibson's brains that have got him where he is today. I've no doubt that most English and American people would rather live together in peace, but - as in any situation like this - the minority of loudmouths and bigots unfortunately shout loudest and so are heard. Unfortunately those bigots include the UK government. Tony Blair and his clan openly detest England and the English, are busily selling it off, taking away its basic freedoms and putting it under the iron-fist rule of unelected suits in Brussels. The laughability of Blair can be truly seen when you realise he's sucking up to a President who is a retard controlled by arms-dealer and big business puppet-masters. Every time Bush opens his mouth he detracts from the total sum of human intelligence. Some Americans harp on about the murderous British Empire, neatly stepping over the fact that the US is currently acting exactly the same as the British Empire at its worst. The white US population came from countries like England (has anyone noticed how so many of them speak english?) and wiped out entire nations and entire ways of life when they invaded the New World. Regarding the War of Independance, far more people died in the American Civil Wars which followed. For what it's worth, I love New York, thought the people there were very nice. I certainly felt less threatened walking the streets there than in places like London or Luton, which are becoming more like third world slums every day. Returning to the subject of xenophobia, I think it might be an idea if people formed their own opinions rather than relying on propaganda-filled movies which are being used in the same way Hitler and Stalin used films to brainwash the people of their countries.

For the benefit of anyone wishing to imply the English are all semi-literate, whales are marine mammals. Wales is the country attached to England.

by StormSworder August 20, 2006

Cherie Blair

The wife of our 'esteemed' Prime Minister, Cherie Blair (formerly Booth) met Tony (formerly Anthony) at a balloon party. Since her husband came to power, Miss Cruella de Ville has wasted thousands of pounds of taxpayers' money on her hairdressing. She charged a charity almost all of the money it had made just for standing up and burbling on about absolutely nothing for five minutes (the charity went belly-up as a result). She now considers herself superior to the Queen, and is making a fortune from her position as the PM's wife. It wouldn't surprise me in the least if she's forced her husband into staying on as PM when it's clear to everyone he should have resigned long ago.

Cherie Blair gets up on stage and blubs about how she's missing her son who's at university.

Cherie, what about all the people your husband has sent to Iraq to fight and maybe die in a war just to inflate his ego! They're all someone's sons!

by StormSworder August 13, 2006