52 definitions by Stoney69
This delicious delicacy is made with the leftover smegma from your gooch. The tasty remnants are then rolled up into little tatter tot sized balls and baked on high for 30-35 minutes. It is crucial that they are given 5 minutes to cool, as this will complete the crisping process. Recommended for ages 5+
Johnny Crapplebees: Yo Tyrant, I’m looking for a nice side to go with my turkey sandwich. Any suggestions?
Tyrantula: Juicy Johnson.. I got the perfect snack for you. Try some of the Tainter Tots I made last night, they’ll really hit the spot and even pack some protein. I also have a nice creamy dipping sauce for ya too if you’re interested ;)
Johnny Crapplebees: Wow.
Tyrantula: Juicy Johnson.. I got the perfect snack for you. Try some of the Tainter Tots I made last night, they’ll really hit the spot and even pack some protein. I also have a nice creamy dipping sauce for ya too if you’re interested ;)
Johnny Crapplebees: Wow.
by Stoney69 March 23, 2019
When a prostitute fiddles with your prostate until you toot, and then you shun her for the rest of the STD bang sesh.
Big Queefy: Yo Boner, I’m tryna hit hooters tonight, you in?
Boney Stoney: First, it’s Boney, not Boner. And second, I’m out. I’m shunning prostitutes rn, I call it prostate-toot-shun. So I’m not down with looking at any Hooter whores tonight. You’ll get multiple STDs just looking at them.
Big Queefy: True, I got Gonorrhea and Crabs just from staring at this Hooter hoe last time. Turns out the crabs were not the food like I thought..
Boney Stoney: Damn that’s hot. Nvm, I’m so in.
Boney Stoney: First, it’s Boney, not Boner. And second, I’m out. I’m shunning prostitutes rn, I call it prostate-toot-shun. So I’m not down with looking at any Hooter whores tonight. You’ll get multiple STDs just looking at them.
Big Queefy: True, I got Gonorrhea and Crabs just from staring at this Hooter hoe last time. Turns out the crabs were not the food like I thought..
Boney Stoney: Damn that’s hot. Nvm, I’m so in.
by Stoney69 July 17, 2022
This occurs when your gonads are hung like a horse and you’re sittin’ on the shit pot. When you flush, the boys get caught in the suction and are ripped from your scrotal sack and flushed into oblivion.
Tyrant: Dude you wanna hit the strip club tonight? I heard Rosie O’ Donnell is gonna be there showing off her FUPA. You could fit a fucking Boeing 737 in that puss.
Big Easy: I’m gonna have to sit this one out my dawg. Just experienced bollock butchery last night. I was going to Dunkin, and next thing I know my cojones get sucked down the shit pipe. Hoping to get a transplant in the next week. I may take one from Phil Collins. There’s a myth going around on the internet that he’s had a third nut all these years. Must be why he’s always coming in the air.
Tyrant: Dude you got serious fucking issues.
Big Easy: I’m gonna have to sit this one out my dawg. Just experienced bollock butchery last night. I was going to Dunkin, and next thing I know my cojones get sucked down the shit pipe. Hoping to get a transplant in the next week. I may take one from Phil Collins. There’s a myth going around on the internet that he’s had a third nut all these years. Must be why he’s always coming in the air.
Tyrant: Dude you got serious fucking issues.
by Stoney69 August 1, 2019
This wonderful event starts out with a man sitting on a wall to show off his crotch to a woman he has a crush on. To show the woman that he is mating material, he will hump the wall in hopes of moistening her lady garden. However, he does not realize that humping the hard wall will stimulate his spinky and cause a great fall... of shit. The poopy will land below on the woman, and all hopes of mating will be crushed.
Tyrant: Yo boss, happy Friday. Any fun plans for the weekend?
The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.
Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.
The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.
Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.
The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.
Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.
The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.
Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.
by Stoney69 December 18, 2020
So one night you’re laying in bed and your stomach starts to hurt. So you go to the bathroom to drop a dook. You start pumpin out some snickers but then you realize you gotta puke. With your b-hole all greased up, you’re hesitant to get off the shitter. Before you can even make any decision, your throat sphincter gives in and releases your intestine goo. Reacting quickly, you aim down at the toilet you are still sitting on... and now you have a puke dick. Nice goin a-hole.
Miguel Cumbrera: Yo amigo. How you handling the quarantino?
Antonio Bonederas: Mi Hermano it’s not going so bueno. Last night I went to drop some snickers in the punch bowl, and I ended up with puke-dick & shit too. At least I can’t go anywhere, so my chicas at the club won’t know.
Miguel Cumbrera: Hombre that’s some gnarly mierda you got there. You and me should get together tomorrow for drinks. How about some Coronas?
Antonio Bonederas: Mi Hermano it’s not going so bueno. Last night I went to drop some snickers in the punch bowl, and I ended up with puke-dick & shit too. At least I can’t go anywhere, so my chicas at the club won’t know.
Miguel Cumbrera: Hombre that’s some gnarly mierda you got there. You and me should get together tomorrow for drinks. How about some Coronas?
by Stoney69 March 25, 2020
An exclamation that a man yells when he is about to go balls deep in his woman’s hoo hoo and wants her to know that his wang is the greatest. This will arouse the woman and make her moister than a 6 month old heavily used sponge.
Stoney: Yo bro, how’s it hangin?
Big Queefy: You mean like how’s it going or how my wang is hangin?
Stoney: I mean.... I guess both lol
Big Queefy: Well I’m doing well thanks for asking. My wang on the other hand is in urgent care recovery. I screamed Allahu Cockbar when I was slamming this hoe last night and she opened up like a newly born clam popping out of its shell. I smashed her way too hard and bruised my brisket. So that’s how my mangled meat is doing.
Stoney: Damn bro, lmk if you need me to tag in next time. I would’ve been ready to go.
Big Queefy: You mean like how’s it going or how my wang is hangin?
Stoney: I mean.... I guess both lol
Big Queefy: Well I’m doing well thanks for asking. My wang on the other hand is in urgent care recovery. I screamed Allahu Cockbar when I was slamming this hoe last night and she opened up like a newly born clam popping out of its shell. I smashed her way too hard and bruised my brisket. So that’s how my mangled meat is doing.
Stoney: Damn bro, lmk if you need me to tag in next time. I would’ve been ready to go.
by Stoney69 September 21, 2021
So you’re having a bad day. What better way to improve the day than to play a joke on someone and make them miserable too? This gag starts by dropping a steamy snickers along with a cream pie in the punch bowl and then dropping an object of importance right next to the toilet. You must now come up with an excuse to make someone else retrieve the item (eg: I threw out my back last night bc Bill Cosby pounded my spinky so good. Could you please help me?). If timed correctly, when the poor lad goes to pick up the item, the toilet will auto flush and the creamy mudpie will splatter onto his face like a child trying to eat a cream filled donut.
Tyrant: Dude I took the kids swimming yesterday. It was a nice day.
Big Easy: Glad you had a nice day, my day was miserable. I went to the shitter and decided to pump and dump. Then told buhl I needed him to pick something up for me. When he went to bend over the toilet flushed at the perfect time and he got mollywhopped by my Boston cream pie. You know what they say, “misery loves cumpoony”.
Tyrant: You need to see a psychiatrist.
Big Easy: Glad you had a nice day, my day was miserable. I went to the shitter and decided to pump and dump. Then told buhl I needed him to pick something up for me. When he went to bend over the toilet flushed at the perfect time and he got mollywhopped by my Boston cream pie. You know what they say, “misery loves cumpoony”.
Tyrant: You need to see a psychiatrist.
by Stoney69 August 30, 2019