A one-time trick that you play on someone who is clueless to your mischieviousness. Ask the clueless person if you have a hole in the seat of your pants because it feels breezy. When the person looks and says no ask the person to look closer. When they get closer to your butt, unsuspectingly looking for a hole, you let out a good old stinky fart!
He is so stupid. I did the Dutch Inquiry on him. He put his face right by my ass looking for the hole and I let out the noxious fumes of a burrito fart.
by Stagmen April 23, 2017

Refers to a snobby, skinny female, with either a skinny, shapely, or large butt, who eats fruit and nuts for breakfast and salads for lunch and dinner, thus making her poop invariably float to the surface when she takes a dump.
Dude, she is such a snob. I took her for a steak dinner and she ordered just a salad. I put up with it, but later discovered after we did the deed, that the droppings she left in the toilet were translucent and floating like a stick in a lake. Wow! She was so snobby and tight I should have figured her for a bowl floater.
by Stagmen April 18, 2017

Banging an ugly woman without having to look at OR listen to her and picturing a beautiful woman in her place. The two bagger and some tape involves tape for over her mouth so you don't hear her talking during the deed, a bag for over her head so you don't have to look at her, and a bag for over your head in case the one over hers breaks.
Dude, how did the date go with that annoying girl, who had the face that looked like an old shoe? Oh my god, she was not just a two bagger. She was a two bagger and some tape. She was so annoying to talk to, and so ugly, but I needed to get laid so bad that I simply put some tape over her mouth, put bags on both of our heads. I then did the deed while picturing young Pamela Anderson's tits and ass.
by Stagmen October 3, 2017

When your eager partner wants you to blow a load and she sticks her finger up you butt and then pulls down on your shaft is alternating directions, giving the appearance that she is a dairy farmer for something more than just milk.
Dude, how did that date go last night with the librarian type chick. Dude, total surprise, she pulled the dairy farmer on me until I blew a load into her bucket!
by Stagmen February 23, 2017

When you are sitting at a table eating with some boring friends, you pull your balls out of the side of your shorts, put your wrist on your thigh, put your balls on top of your wrist, and say to your friends "hey, have you seen my new wristwatch?" Your friends then look and see your balls on your wrist.
by Stagmen November 30, 2016

When you press your butt against a hard, flat-surfaced chair and fart, but there is no place for the gas to escape except up the crack of your ass. and out at the top.
Dude, I laid the biggest periscope fart in detention. I press my butt cheeks against the hard chair and farted and the gas came bubbling up the crack of my ass and peeked out at the top!
by Stagmen June 20, 2017

The game made famous in the 40-year old virgin. You take four Tylenol PMs and then masturbate to see if you can blow a load before falling asleep. The best part is either way you win!
I was so bored last night so I played snooze or spooge--It didn't really matter the outcome because I was a winner both ways!
by Stagmen November 30, 2017
