11 definition by Stagmen

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Refers to a snobby, skinny female, with either a skinny, shapely, or large butt, who eats fruit and nuts for breakfast and salads for lunch and dinner, thus making her poop invariably float to the surface when she takes a dump.
Dude, she is such a snob. I took her for a steak dinner and she ordered just a salad. I put up with it, but later discovered after we did the deed, that the droppings she left in the toilet were translucent and floating like a stick in a lake. Wow! She was so snobby and tight I should have figured her for a bowl floater.
by Stagmen April 18, 2017

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A phrase to show that someone is completely clueless. The Egyptian two-step in when a male exits the bathroom after urination but forgets to zip his fly, such that his junk swings to one side with a right step, then swings to the other with a left step. The male is totally clueless that this is occurring.
Did he realize that he just misfired the weapon in the wrong direction? No? Have him do the Egyptian two-step over to do some push ups.
by Stagmen February 23, 2017

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When you are sitting at a table eating with some boring friends, you pull your balls out of the side of your shorts, put your wrist on your thigh, put your balls on top of your wrist, and say to your friends "hey, have you seen my new wristwatch?" Your friends then look and see your balls on your wrist.
Dude, did you see the new episode of Grey's Anatomy? No, but have you seen my new wristwatch?
by Stagmen November 30, 2016

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When your eager partner wants you to blow a load and she sticks her finger up you butt and then pulls down on your shaft is alternating directions, giving the appearance that she is a dairy farmer for something more than just milk.
Dude, how did that date go last night with the librarian type chick. Dude, total surprise, she pulled the dairy farmer on me until I blew a load into her bucket!
by Stagmen February 23, 2017

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A person who pillages and plunders any penis-shaped vegetable so he can stick it up his own ass or the ass of his pirated partner
Dude, he is hanging out with all the chicks, why? Dude, he is not a threat to them, since he is a zucchini pirate looking only for homo vegetable play friends, arg!!!
by Stagmen March 29, 2017

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A one-time trick that you play on someone who is clueless to your mischieviousness. Ask the clueless person if you have a hole in the seat of your pants because it feels breezy. When the person looks and says no ask the person to look closer. When they get closer to your butt, unsuspectingly looking for a hole, you let out a good old stinky fart!
He is so stupid. I did the Dutch Inquiry on him. He put his face right by my ass looking for the hole and I let out the noxious fumes of a burrito fart.
by Stagmen April 23, 2017

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When a skinny, snobby, entitled chick wears butt & form-fitting pants, but her butt, waist and lower back are all the same width, giving not the appearance of an hourglass figure and a shapely rump, but rather the appearance of a square box from the middle of her back to the top of her hamstrings.
Dude, how's that date go the other night? Well, she wore Spongebob Baylypants and her ass looked like ole square pants himself, and when she took them off at the end of the night, it was not much better, but I did make that square box butt jiggle from her back to the top of her legs when I did the deed!
by Stagmen June 26, 2017

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