Definitions by Spirit Bear

metrics 

Call center slang. This word encompasses the statistics that are taken on call center agents to determine their worth. Usually includes average handle time (AHT), wrap, hold time and a few other basic metrics as well as a few 'spin' metrics added by the client to give the client a feeling of control.

They said Rob got canned because of poor metrics, but we all know the real reason.

metrics by Spirit Bear October 28, 2004

call center 

A place where companies outsource customer service or technical support, ostensibly because it's cheaper than having in-house support. They are notorious for hiring anyone who can lift a headset and operate a keyboard and firing people for completely lame reasons whenever it is no longer proffitable to keep them or they are elligable for a pay increase. A large portion of the furry community works in call centers.

"I've worked in four or five call centers over the last few years. Maybe some day I'll get a real job," Rob said, then hit his Ready button to take another call.

call center by Spirit Bear October 28, 2004

lifer

Someone who makes a career out of working in a particular call center. There will usually be one or two people in a call center that have been there for eight years or so (maybe longer) who have somehow escaped the regular fire-hire process that call centers go through. They usually have a tired, burnt-out look to them and can be seen hunching over their workstation in a hazy daze.

Rob wanted to be a lifer but he kept getting canned because of his metrics.

lifer by Spirit Bear October 28, 2004

The Big Nasty 

A process that used to be used back in the day by call center agents supporting cable modems. It was a long, multi-step average handle time killer that included ripping out Windows' TCP/IP components, removing and re-installing network drivers, deleting the related entries from the registry, deleting some Windows system files that were frequently corrupted, restoring the system files, rebooting a few times, getting up and doing the chicken dance on your desk, calling the Mentor Line a few dozen times and guzzling lots of coffee. Always done as a last resort, usually at the recommendation of a mentor.

John tried ripping the stack and the nic, but that didn't work so he just did The Big Nasty and that got her back online.

The Big Nasty by Spirit Bear October 28, 2004

bullshit reason

Call center jargon. This is the excuse that a call center or your hiring agency gives you for your being canned.

"My bullshit reason for Stream was they said I was browsing porn" Jeremy said, "even though they have a blocking proxy installed and I wasn't at my workstation when it supposedly happened."

bullshit reason by Spirit Bear October 28, 2004

canned 

Call center jargon. Short for "shit canned." It can be used to mean getting fired, but it is usually implied that you were canned for a stupid reason, usually called a bullshit reason. Call centers are notorious for making up lame excuses for firing employees in order to improve their financial forcast.

Rob got canned from Deathbridge again today.

canned by Spirit Bear October 28, 2004

outsource 

The process of hiring a call center to perform customer service and/or technical support, or other support tasks, obstensibly because it is cheaper than having an in-house support team. Companies also outsource to preserve their reputation, as they can use the hand of god to fire any call center employee who isn't performing in line with their vision without anyone knowing; can hire and fire employees en mass with no regrets.

My job at Foo Inc was outsourced, so I went to work for the company they outsourced to at greatly reduced pay.

outsource by Spirit Bear October 28, 2004