Definitions by Roger the Cabin Boy

d'artagnan 

After the seventeenth-century French soldier, one who is exceptionally skilled in the use of the pork sword. Far outranks a mere swordsman.

He was a veritable D'Artagnan among mere pork swordsmen

d'artagnan by Roger the Cabin Boy September 13, 2008

jam donut week

Monthly female occurence which men don't understand, other than it stops (most of) them having sex with their girlfriends. Inspired by similarity in appearance, rather than taste. See also on the blob, got the painters in and Arsenal are playing at home.

"What' the matter mate? You look frustrated."

"Haven't blown me beans for days, Dave. Fucking jam donut week, innit."

jam donut week by Roger the Cabin Boy September 13, 2008

chillionaire 

Someone who has made a tonne of money while still young, probably in one of the dotcom booms or by selling off another business they founded, and now loafs around doing cool stuff

Gary Fisher, Elon Musk are chillionaires

chillionaire by Roger the Cabin Boy August 22, 2006

veiny love tree 

Err, it's a penis, obviously.

'...shaking hot white coconuts from the veiny love tree..."

The League of Gentlemen

veiny love tree by Roger the Cabin Boy August 18, 2006

update 

To have anal sex: derived from the Australian slang date, meaning asshole, on account of its generally round, wrinkled and brown appearance.

"Let me update you."

"I'm hoping to update her this evening."

"He promised he would update me. It's most frustrating."

"I've been giving him hourly updates."

update by Roger the Cabin Boy August 18, 2006

trap two 

Female anus; derived from greyhound racing terminology. See also blue jacket.

"Trap one was out of action, so I had to use trap two."

trap two by Roger the Cabin Boy August 18, 2006

blue jacket 

Awarded to a man who has had anal sex with a female partner. Derived from British greyhound racing terminology, where the dog wearing the blue jacket traditionally starts in trap two. See also brown wings.

"I wore the blue jacket last night..."

blue jacket by Roger the Cabin Boy August 18, 2006