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Rob Porter's definitions

hoedown

(n.) What a police officer says on his radio after encountering an injured or dead prostitute.
"Unit 3 - we have a hoedown! Clear?"
by Rob Porter January 3, 2009
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munching monkey

Belinda and Stephanie got together for a 69 and ended up munching monkey all night long.
by Rob Porter December 24, 2007
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loogie

(n.) A mass of mucous and saliva that is forcefully ejected from the mouth onto a person or object.

The noun loogie is commonly used in conjunction with the verb 'hock.' See example below:
Lucy: "Ethel! Did you just hock a loogie in my coffee?"

Ethel: "Why, yes, Lucy, don't I always?"

Lucy: "Oh yeah I forgot! My FAVORITE!"

Ethel: "You empty the pot and I'll give you some snot, deal??"

Lucy: "MMMMMMmmmmmm!!! Thanks, Ethel! Jeepers you're the greatest! Gosh I've been hocking loogies in Ricky's coffee for eleven years (sigh). You know how those Cubans are about their boogers..."

"Yes... that fat fucker Fred is the same way. Hmph... MEN!!!
by Rob Porter February 23, 2009
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gleet

(n.) the whitish discharge that oozes from the urethra when one has gonorrhea. This is seen in both males and females (most other definitions of gleet referring to saliva and spitting are false. Gleet has nothing to do with saliva, unless you suck off or eat out a person with gonorrhea).
Is that gleet on your pants or are you just glad to see me?
by Rob Porter October 2, 2007
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snot grabber

(n.) A nasty euphemism for a handkerchief or a tissue.
Jim: Hey, Jeff, hand me another tissue, please.

Jeff: I just gave you 3 Kleenex... how many snot grabbers do you plan to use, asshole?
by Rob Porter January 4, 2009
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dinge binge

(n.) A certain kind of addictive feature that occurs when a dinge queen goes into a manic state.
"Hey, what's up with Bubba? Did he go on another dinge binge or something?"

"Yes. He's in Harlem Heaven right now."
by Rob Porter September 30, 2007
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Spanish moss

The pubic hair of an elderly ho, which is often moldy, greenish in color, and infested with crabs, lice, brown recluse spiders, beetle larvae, maggots and other living and dead organisms. The aroma given off from Spanish moss is overwhelming and can sometimes be fatal.
Doctor: Nurse, come in here please! I can't place a catheter in this patient!

Nurse: Why not, Doctor? Is there too much Spanish moss around her twat or something?

Doctor: Maybe so. Would you give me a hand on this one??

Nurse: Sure, doctor. Let me put on some gloves and I'll see if I can make my way through that Spanish moss. Pee-ooo!


*** RELATED LIMERICK ***

There was an old whore from the Azores,
Whose cunt was so covered with sores;
That the dogs in the street
Wouldn't eat the green meat,
That hung from festoons on her drawers.
by Rob Porter January 14, 2009
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