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Rick Roberson's definitions

fudge factory

(n.) Synonymous with asshole, ring piece, anus, poopie hole, dumphole and scatoody.

The term 'fudge factory' is a euphemism for the anus, used by parents and teachers when conversing with children about personal hygiene.
"Emily, you must remember to wash and clean your fudge factory before getting out of the bathtub."
by Rick Roberson April 26, 2009
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bumfoozler

(n.) An aged, male homosexual.
Your grandfather won't keep his eyes off my ass. He's a fucking bumfoozler, man. You're not a faggot, too, are you??
by Rick Roberson February 1, 2010
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fucking face

(verb/gerund) The definition should be self-explanatory: something only a male can do. To fuck a face is to repeatedly ram your cock into the mouth of an individual. In most cases, the mouth is a more-than-adequate substitute for the preferred vagina or anus.

Fucking face is a very popular past-time for gay male couples and heterosexual couples. Anyone can suck face, but lesbians cannot truly fuck face for obvious reasons. In their case, the tongue is a more-than-adequate substitute for the depraved penis.
Lola: "Hey Steve, why didn't you guys come to my party last night?"

Steve: "Oh, Bruce and I started fucking face and couldn't stop."

Lola: "Well you missed all the fun! Darren gave Chuck a rusty trombone and I sat on Joe's face!"

Steve: "Well, fuck me dead and bury me pregnant!"
by Rick Roberson January 26, 2011
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scatoody

(n.) A slang word used by parents, teachers, doctors and other adults that refers to the anus when conversing with children about personal hygiene. This terminology can also be used in general adult conversation.

see also: fudge factory
Blanch: What's for lunch, Jane???

Baby Jane: None of your business. It's a surprize.

Blanch: Will it be a mouse or bird of the week? How about some used cat litter on the side?

Baby Jane: Ah, shut up, ya talking zit!! And if you don't like my cooking you can kiss my scatoody!

Blanch: I'd rather eat a warm nutritious bowl of fermented maggots, you has-been HO!

Baby Jane: OK, then I'll drink another bottle of Listerine and puke it all up!

Blanch: That would be one tasty broth, and I can have that for my soup! Oh, thank you dear sister Jane! Tell me... what's for supper???
by Rick Roberson May 3, 2009
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love crater

(n.) The opening to any body cavity (or mechanical masturbatory device) into which the penis can be inserted for sexual gratification.

When the possessor of a particular hole or orifice is a living individual, he/she also experiences sexual gratification. In this case, the term “love crater” can refer to:

1. the mouth (cake hole);
2. the vagina (if applicable: pussy, snatch, twat, cunt, meat wallet), or
3. the anal sphincter (asshole, balloon knot, dumphole, fudge factory, ring-piece).

In the case of solitary mechanical masturbation, the term can also refer to:

1. one's curled-up fingers, or the fist;
2. a jar of cold cream;
3. a melon (such as a cantaloupe); or
4. a vacuum cleaner hose (not recommended by this author).
Husband: Suppose we’ll be having sexual intercourse tonight, dear?

Wife: Oh yes definitely, sweetheart!

Husband: Anything in particular you’d like me to do?

Wife: Yes! I want full-length cock-stabbing penetration of my well-rimmed love crater, honey! Now let me make a man out of you!!

Husband: But darling, into which love crater do you wish for me to insert my penile member?

Wife: All three, baby! Now let’s cut the crap and get naked and nasty, all right?! Aaarrrgghhh-shlurp-shloosh...
by Rick Roberson January 2, 2012
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scumbag

1. (n.) vulgar slang for a used condom. This nomenclature has been widely used for decades.

2. (n.) One that is disgusting, disreputable or possessing of low-life characteristics.
1. David, you've got a pile of scumbags on your night table. How about getting rid of them? The aroma is about to make me puke my guts out!

2. Did I overhear someone talking about Jessie Sue's new boyfriend? I've known him for years. He's nothing but a cock-sucking, shit-eating scumbag.
by Rick Roberson March 2, 2009
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Hello, girls!

(greeting) What a blind man says when walking in close proximity to a fish market.
Zippa-dee-doo-dah, zippa-dee-day... Oh! Hello, girls!
by Rick Roberson June 14, 2010
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