Raoulduke69's definitions

dickless horseman

a ghostly apparition that appears holding a severed dick in his hands while riding a horse.

the story is that the dickless horseman was the town drunk, who, in an attempt to obtain more liquor, hopped on his horse bare assed in a drunken stupor. while riding to town he fell from his horse after getting his dick caught in the reigns. now he rides the roads in search of whiskey, and a doctor who can sew his dick back on.

by Raoulduke69 January 16, 2023

Meatflop

The act of thrusting the hips forward and back so that the dick and balls slap against the gooch making a "flop, flop, flop" noise. Can be done with or without pants on.

Guy 1: that comedian's jokes sucked ass.
Guy 2: yeah but lucky for him he wore those baggy basketball shorts so he could perform a good meatflop to get the crowd going.

by Raoulduke69 August 23, 2022

eyelock

when a woman's ass is so fantastic you can't look away even if it runs the risk of being caught staring.

"i was in Target the other day and this chick's ass gave me such eyelock that i walked right into a shelf display...and STILL kept staring."

by Raoulduke69 December 13, 2022

cockroach ass

usually caused by being overweight. often exacerbated if the person already had a flat ass. the two asscheeks meet at the bottom to form almost a point. reminiscent of the bottom of cockroach's body.

"man that chick needs to do some squats or something before she gets full blown cockroach ass"

by Raoulduke69 December 13, 2022

noble prize

an award given out yearly for being the shittiest employee at barnes and noble WITHOUT getting fired.

"man look at Tim. hes late everyday, comes in high as hell, drinks all the coffee at the bar and sleeps on the reading sofa and hes STILL not been fired. hes a shoo-in for the noble prize this year".

by Raoulduke69 January 17, 2024

the noble surprise

when someone at barnes and noble leaves a printed out dick pick photo in the book or magazine of their choice. the hope is that someone will open the book or mag and a dick pic will fall out so others can laugh at them.

"dude my grandma picked up a better homes and garden mag at barnes and noble and got the noble surprise right when her pastor walked by".

by Raoulduke69 January 17, 2024

bitchitus

while not as often talked about, it is actually the most common virus known to exist. the vast majority of women contract the virus at least a dozen times in a single year. a common misconception is that only women can be infected.

woman: (nah, nah, blah, blah, blah, nag, nag, bitch, complain, etc.)
man: ah shit she's got bitchitus again i better go quarantine myself in my shop with a fat joint and a six pack.

by Raoulduke69 November 16, 2023