QuacksO's definitions

hairoin

A drug that makes your cranial-fur longer and thicker.

The real reason that hairoin is illegal is the same as it is for marijuana, ephedra, tryptophan, and some other substances --- it **works** and is **cheap**, and so the greedy scalp-tonic companies that sell all these costly growth-stimulation products that often produce little or no actual results don't want it on the market... it isn't harmful or hazardous; it would just put them out of business!!

by QuacksO November 29, 2019

cerealogical tests

Examinations and analyses of spilled/leftover Cheerios and cornflakes to determine what your diet is and its effects on your overall well-being.

Da doctors tried to run cerealogical tests on me, but seeing as how I usually "eat healthy" instead of voraciously chowing down on Fruit Loops or Peanut Butter Crunch, there wasn't much they could determine from a few scattered grains of brown rice and plain rolled-oats flakes.

by QuacksO February 7, 2020

metropolitician

City-slicker dude who works for da government.

Dat urban mucky-muck legislator doesn't have a clue about how county folks have to live --- he's so totally a metropolitician!

by QuacksO May 16, 2023

trackupuncture

"Sharp 'n' pointed" medical treatment intended to "needle" you into performing better on da ol' athletic field.

There's only so much dat trackupuncture can do to improve stamina and performance --- if eventually it merely comes down to a classic case of "da ol' gray mare's just not being what she used to be", it may be time to resign yourself to retirement and hang up da running-shoes!

by QuacksO February 8, 2023

IKIA effect

The feeling that an action or object is more special/virtuous/valuable if it was performed or acquired while riding/driving in a KIA automobile.

"KIA --- the power to surprise." If you actually believe in the IKIA effect, you will certainly experience some "surprise", all right --- anything that happens while being transported by a KIA vehicle probably will not actually be any more amazing or notable than if it occurred in any other common brand of car.

by QuacksO May 30, 2018

rebuttle

A counterclaim or denial of fact regarding da actions of an employed manservant.

In old-world tales of crime among da "upper crust", da classic claim dat "da butler did it" would almost certainly have often been cause for a staunch/indignant rebuttle from said paid lackey.

by QuacksO January 27, 2023

sononymous

"Like Papa, like Little Man."

Conceiving lots of male offspring with multiple women is sononymous with having a perpetually-horny love-pipe. If all of THEM inherit said "perpetually hot between their legs" attribute, though, it's anybody's guess whether there would actually be a sufficient number of "willing" chicks in da local area to satisfy that many eager young studs!

by QuacksO February 16, 2025