A "snake oil" product intended to enhance da health, longevity, and "slippery" status of da infamous two-pronged speaking-appendage of a habitually-less-than-truthful person.
Since tongue oil is intended for a forked food-manipulator like a snake has, perhaps this same extract-of-cobra elixir (or maybe it could be spelled "elicksir" in this case, since dat's one of da main purposes of da bodily organ on which said restorative lubricant is used) could also be applied to someone's "trouser snake" by his romantic partner, to preserve said organ's smooth/supple/spongy qualities and thus maintain a pleasant "mouth feel" for said main squeeze when administering a blowjob. One would hope dat said topical ointment possesses a pleasant-or-at-least-neutral flavor, since performing fellatio on a body-part to which you just applied a rejuvenating substance would literally be giving you a taste of your own medicine!
by QuacksO September 04, 2022
Get the tongue oilmug. Schools should practice "dew process" --- i.e., inform their students dat drinking citrus soda will **not act** as a contraceptive --- in their sex-ed classes, as well.
by QuacksO June 26, 2021
Get the dew processmug. A slammer where they send perpetually-horny dudes who display frequent "obvious" arousals between their legs.
To avoid being sent to a cerectional facility, I wear an abdominal cup whenever I have to venture out in public where I'm likely to see voluptuous scantily-clad women; this way, da entire front of my pants bulges out in a huge rounded protrusion while my dick can invisibly rise and fall freely inside da cup's hollow interior, and so it appears to observers like I am merely afflicted with bloated intestines.
by QuacksO July 02, 2023
Get the cerectional facilitymug. Old fogy: I don't see what all da cellibration is about --- why, when I was a boy, we hadda sit still and use a CORDED phone if we wanted to call somebody, and it worked just fine for us!
by QuacksO March 23, 2021
Get the cellibrationmug. Refers to prototype-drawings/schematics that turned out NOT to be quite "what da doctor ordered" --- i.e., they may have looked good on paper, but there were significant miscalculations/oversights, causing parts of the creation to break, fall apart, bind, be too long/short, not fit, etc.
When the Pink Panther beamingly showed the Little Big-Nosed Guy his drawn idea for a fantastical "dream house", the midget builder scoffingly waved the plans off as nuthin' but a stack of cloud-cuckoo blooperints!
by QuacksO November 17, 2018
Get the blooperintsmug. Refers to the variety of female posterior-types that a majority of horny studs like to have access to... small tight firm round derrieres for spanking and lap-sitting, large floppy jiggly heinies for deeper more satisfying kneading and squeezing, flatter and more massageable buns for simple rubbing and caressing, and so on.
Some dudes choose to stick with one type of butt-cheeks for all of their squeezing/spanking/humping needs, but as for me, I prefer more of an ASSortment.
by QuacksO September 21, 2017
Get the ASSortmentmug. During winter months, you should always maintain an oversneeze bank account to ensure dat other folks in your household don't "blow through" your entire supply, and dat you'll therefore still have some to use for your own copiously-draining nasal-works.
by QuacksO October 16, 2021
Get the oversneeze bank accountmug.