local Lauren forcement

What we'd have if Ms. Bacall was sheriff.

Since da former Mrs. Humphrey Bogart was such a strong proponent of women's rights, said famous Liberal-Party actress might have had to do some major 'weeding of da ranks" --- or at least instigate a robustly-potent gender-fairness-training program --- if she'd assumed a "local Lauren forcement" role, since not all of da deputies under her control might have been similarly equality-minded.

by QuacksO March 17, 2024

Vin Da Boner

The infamous leftist television-producer who only hires people whose appearance gives him a reaction "down there".

Showing up in a skimpy outfit for a job-interview might indeed give you a somewhat better chance of being hired by Vin Da Boner, but race tends to be more of a deciding factor for him than just attractive physical appearance.

by QuacksO October 30, 2018

gone with the wind

The status of your sensitive-nosed companions after you fart.

If you love stewed cabbage and baked beans, using an activated-charcoal seat-cushion can better your chances that your visiting buddies will not "be gone with the wind" partway through your meal.

by QuacksO September 14, 2020

protective cusstody

Imprisonment designed to shield someone from swearing and other crude language.

What good is protective cusstody if da jailers and other officials of da clink grumble and/or shout profanity/obscenity-laced remarks themselves?!??

by QuacksO January 24, 2023

fart dieseling

Da embarrassing (or hilarious, depending on who you talk to, and/or whether da emotions-feeler is da "actor" or da "observer") interval of "run-on" dat sometimes occurs following da "main event" --- i.e., yer butt-trumpet keeps on "purrin' like a kitten" for an extended period afterwards, rather than just "saying its piece" and then being done wif it.

In da uproarious "National Baked Bean Month" speech, da formally-dignified speaker experiences a major bout of fart dieseling towards da end, totally goofing up said oration but majorly putting his audience in stitches.

by QuacksO June 12, 2024

Juss flappin' yer coat-tails

In other words, juss sassin' ya. Comes from da playful-but-annoying practice of coming up behind someone who's wearing a long jacket with a divided lower back, grabbing da jacket just above da slit, and then vigorously/rapidly yanking da lower part of da jacket in and out to make da pair of tails slap against da person's butt.

Me: If yer too warm, why doncha go take a dip in da ocean?
You: Jump in da ocean??? Are you crazy??? It's chilly and whitecaps-windy out there!
Me: I know, I know... juss flappin' yer coat-tails...! :D

by QuacksO March 23, 2019

sirmise

What male chauvinists arrogantly do when deciding how da fairer gender should treat them, and vice-versa.

I think dat female humans are da greatest thing on Earth, so I would never sirmise to feel or act superior to them.

by QuacksO February 23, 2021