QuacksO's definitions

obeadyent

Following specified rules regarding da stringing up of necklaces and bracelets.

T'ain't no fun bein' watched like a hawk by an overseer with small glittery eyeballs while taking jewelry-making classes... rather than making everyone be obeadyent, let yer **pupils** (get it? Eyes? :P) have some creative freedom in da colors, sizes, and arrangements of da decorative spheres dat they're each assembling into something unique and expressive.

by QuacksO January 13, 2025

surjury

Heavy-duty treatment to rid someone of his addiction to courtroom-drama.

I try hard to stay out of legal trouble myself, and programs like Law & Order, People's Court, or CSI don't appeal to me, anyway, so I would not likely ever need surjury!

by QuacksO November 7, 2023

u.l.p.e.

Stands for "unauthorized local percussion expert", and refers to a self-possessed a**h**e living near you who fancies himself such a pro on da drums dat he plays dem from early morning, almost continuously all day, and late into da night, disturbing da public peace and keeping all his peace-'n'-quiet-loving neighbors awake till all hours.

{{Thump-thump-thump, thump-thump-thump, thump-thum-thuh-thuh-thuh-thuh-thump; thump-thump-thump, thump-thump-thump, thump-thum-thuh-thuh-thuh-thuh-thump...}}
Citizen: Ooooooohhhh, brother --- there goes our u.l.p.e. bangin' on his confounded drums again! How can he play 'em all day and half da night like dat?! Don't his arms and wrists ever get sore? Doesn't he ever sleep???

by QuacksO November 13, 2018

hypeoxia

A serious chemical-imbalance in the respiratory system caused by excessive "puffing" --- i.e., super-praising "blow-hard" reviews of a person/product/idea that is just "inflated" and insincere "hot air".

Jay Bush must have gotten hypeoxia from all his bragging on TV about how great his baked beans were... some people might like them, but I think they taste awful.

by QuacksO March 6, 2019

religious engine-cranking

Onomatopoeia description for the sound of a starter-motor.

When cold-starting a vehicle with a carburetor instead of fuel injection, one should use this religious engine-cranking method:
(1) Push-and-release the gas-pedal to the floor twice. ("Pumpa-pumpa")
(2) Crank the engine for one second. ("Jesuit-esuit")
(3) Push-and-release the gas-pedal to the floor two more times. ("Pumpa-pumpa")
(4) Crank the engine for one second again. ("Jesuit-esuit")
(5) Push-and-release the gas-pedal to the floor three more times. ("Pumpa-pumpa-pumpa")
(4) Crank the engine again for several rotations; it should start this time. ("Jesuit-esuit-esuit-esuit-vrOOOOM!!")

by QuacksO September 30, 2020

pepidemic

Da widespread abuse of stimulants.

Coffee and stimulant-imbued soft drinks are super-heavily consumed in da state of Missizippy, with everyone whizzing about in a frenzied cafffeine-buzz --- there is an absolute pepidemic there!

by QuacksO June 30, 2020

volume discount

A percentage off da standard price dat you are allowed if you ask for it loudly.

If a merchant has a "volume discount" policy whereby he will "match decibels with discounts" --- i.e., if your vocal-level is 25 dB when you ask for a cheaper price, you get 25% off; raising your voice to 30 dB gains you 30% off, etc. --- then da key would be to actually haul in a moderately-powerful PA system wif huge boomy loudspeakers --- or show up wif several of your buddies speaking through high-wattage megaphones --- and really B-L-A-S-T your price-easement request at a HUNDRED decibels... not only might you indeed obtain said products at no charge, but da shop-owner might simply be more than happy to give you da merchandise for free just to get you and your deafeningly-noisy equipment or bullhorn-toting retinue outta his joint!! :P

by QuacksO March 15, 2023