Poll Hereford's definitions

hair masons

Hair dressers who specialise in achieving wind-tunnel proof standards

Magda's 'do was a masterpiece of the hair masons of Budapest's art. The shape of a belgian chocolate, it could withstand the blast of a jet engine with no movement.

by Poll Hereford November 2, 2009

arsegrass

The basic clothing of the New Guinea Highlands, being two large hanks of grass stuck into a belt, one fore, one aft.

The Mt Hagen Sing Sing moves on the rustle of arsegrass.

by Poll Hereford November 2, 2009

hot-buttered fart

The distinctive smell of the multiplex cinema showing this season's action pic, favoured by adolescent boys. Hot buttered popcorn and farts defying the best efforts of mechnical ventilation.

The lingering memory of Spiderman was the smell of a combined hot-buttered fart from the three previous sessions.

by Poll Hereford November 2, 2009

wouldn't know if they had a bus up them

Complete cluelessness and lack of awareness of one's surroundings.

Those idiots wouldn't know if they had a bus up them

by Poll Hereford November 3, 2009

gnaw my own arm off

The last thing you'd ever want to do.

I'd rather gnaw my own arm off than go to that party.

by Poll Hereford November 3, 2009

monkey looking out of a bear's arsehole

An ugly woman with long frizzy hair

Winsome was the spitting image of a monkey looking out of a bear's arsehole.

by Poll Hereford November 2, 2009

twenty pounds of crack

What the larger ladies have inside their underwear.

Rosie O'Donnell was busted at the airport with twenty pounds of crack in her pants.

by Poll Hereford November 2, 2009