Pedrosa von Beagle's definitions

Tossometer

An imaginary device that measures how truly dire something is.

Guy1: "Get a load of my new Hawaian shirt - it rocks!"
Guy2: "Sorry dude, it's a ten on the tossometer."

by Pedrosa von Beagle May 8, 2006

Thrawhapo

The exclamation you make when imaging the noise your hand would make on the snare-drum tight ass of a hottie-McHot-Hot girl in spray on leather jeans when you slap her playfully on the backside, knowing that she will truly enjoy and appreciate the gesture, as she turns to link arms with you before bearing you many strong and fine sons. If it this does happen to you then you are living in the Matrix and have discovered that some rules can be bent; others can be broken. Usually it will result in one's nose being bent, sometimes broken.

Dude #1: "Whoa! Look at the arse on that! Don't try to stop me!"
Thrawhapo (sound of hand on leather).
Dude #2: "Here. Have my handkerchief. It will help staunch the bleeding from your nose dude!"

by Pedrosa von Beagle September 25, 2006

Haslet

The name of the Great Smoked Pork Lion in the book "The Lying Bitch & Her Wardrobe". He is the guardian of the enchanted land of Yawnia.

Haslet, The King of Beastly Snacks, opened his mighty jaws and belched. The mighty wind of His great eructation bent every tree in Yawnia, and the aroma of smoked ham covered the enchanted land.

by Pedrosa von Beagle November 15, 2006

dwagster

The vehicle Elmer Fudd uses to race Buggs Bunny at Long Beach.

Elmer: Hewwo. I'm wacing wabbits at Wong Beach.
Bugs: See ya in St. Louis, screwy!
Elmer: Qwick! get my dwagster fueled!

by Pedrosa von Beagle August 20, 2006

pop a socket

The result of over-enthusiastic weight training or body-building. When you just had to do that extra rep at 250 pounds but should have known better, and pop your shoulder out of its socket as a result.

Jason: "No. I'm OK! I can do one more rep!"
Pete: "Jason, that's 36 stone you're pressing!
Jason: "I'm OK! I can do it. Hnnnnnggghhhhahhhhrrrgggg!"
Pete: "What ? What's the matter???!!!!??"
Jason: "Sheeee-it! My shoulders!"
Pete: "That's the way to pop a socket!"

by Pedrosa von Beagle September 8, 2006

Quantus theory

The concept that it's much better to emigrate to Australia than live in a tired and rather shabby looking United Kingdom. The theory sounds great, but is complicated by the Drongo Uncertainty Principle, in which you either live in Australia but realise it's not as great as you thought it would be (which usually occurs when the deadly finger-web spider bites you on the funnel) OR you're in the UK, it's cold, wet, and dismal, and you've just been mugged for your mobile phone, and so you dream of an idyllic life in the sun playing with large friendly marsupials (known as 'Ozzies').

In the UK:
Gerald: 'That Johnny in the hooded top just beat me up and took my phone!'
Edward: 'Ahhhh! Playing with the Ozzies in the balmy climes of Australia would be so much better!'
Gerald: 'Ahhh! Quantus theory!'
------------------------------------
Simultaneously in Australia:
Tadger: 'Bollocks mate! I just got bit on the funnel by a finger-web spider!'
Johnno: 'No wucking furries mate, we'll move to England.'
Tadger: 'Rack off! That's just Quantus theory!'

by Pedrosa von Beagle September 10, 2008

wimp out

To back out of something in an especially weak and wimpish manner.

Guy1: "Hey, yo' still coming to the pub tonight? We'll do a gallon and then have a curry!"
Guy2: "I can't now, I've got some letters to write and then I have to wash my hair."
Guy1: "That is a total wimp out bro."

by Pedrosa von Beagle April 25, 2006