Octopod's definitions

stuffed shirt

A wealthy, self-important, overly formal type; a fellow with a stick up his arse. A pompous ass.

"Have your heard? Cholmondely is in love with a horse!"
"Do tell! Is it a mare or a stallion?"
"Oh, a mare, of course. Nothing queer about Cholmondely!"

by octopod February 24, 2004

stick up his ass

Pompous, a stiff, tighter than a duck's ass.

John Kerry has a stick up his ass.

by octopod March 4, 2004

tighter than a duck's ass

Impermeable. I.e., watertight.

My English teacher is tighter than the proverbial duck's ass.

by octopod March 4, 2004

Chinaman's chance

No chance at all.

The evil elf Kucinich hasn't got a Chinaman's chance of winning the nomination.

by octopod March 4, 2004

a song

Unreasonably or unexpectedly inexpensive.

I was at the swap meet and I bought this dog with a bobbly head for my dashboard for a song.

by octopod March 4, 2004

briss

Ritual, ceremonial circumcision. Yiddish pronunciation of "berith" = "covenant."

3 men fainted at the last briss I went to.

by octopod March 4, 2004

Bzzistan

Any Central Asian place where there are deserts, Bactrian camels, fermented mare's milk, and a name ending in "-stan."

Our correspondent, just back from Bzzistan, is here in our studio, having had just enough time to wipe off the camel spit.

by octopod March 6, 2004