What airport security officers do to you if you blink wrong.
Imagine a group of people putting gloves on and taking turns shoving it really far up your ass.
Imagine a group of people putting gloves on and taking turns shoving it really far up your ass.
Airport cop: Name?
b: {very arabic name}
Airport cop: Come with me, please.
b: God dammit, it's an anal cavity search, isn't it?
Airport cop: Don't worry, we're only violating a COUPLE of your rights..
*glove snaps*
b: {very arabic name}
Airport cop: Come with me, please.
b: God dammit, it's an anal cavity search, isn't it?
Airport cop: Don't worry, we're only violating a COUPLE of your rights..
*glove snaps*
by Name removed by the NSA January 03, 2014
A badass, classic monster. It resembles a human, except for it's long, sharp fangs, and unusually pale skin. It lives on blood, sucking it from it's victims by biting them, usually on the neck. Similar to a zombie, the victim either dies, or turns into a vampire.
A vampire sleeps in a coffin during the day, as it will burn in the daylight. It is also often associated with bats.
Not to be confused with a sparkling little fucking FAIRY that stalks girls in high school 1/8 their age.
A vampire sleeps in a coffin during the day, as it will burn in the daylight. It is also often associated with bats.
Not to be confused with a sparkling little fucking FAIRY that stalks girls in high school 1/8 their age.
Girl: OMGG EDWARD IS SOOOOO HAWT!!!!1!!ONE1!!!!!
Boy: Please die..
This is an example of how the Vampire has been tainted forever.
Boy: Please die..
This is an example of how the Vampire has been tainted forever.
by Name removed by the NSA December 14, 2013
by Name removed by the NSA December 19, 2013
by Name removed by the NSA January 03, 2014
Atheist: religion is the biggest lie in the history of humankind *insert rest of shitfest*
Normal person: how about you just let me believe what I want to believe?
Atheist: *mind explodes*
Normal person: how about you just let me believe what I want to believe?
Atheist: *mind explodes*
by Name removed by the NSA December 09, 2013
The manliest person on earth
Facts about Chuck Norris:
-Chuck Norris was born on may 6, 1945. Nazi Germany surrendered the next day.
(Look it up)
-Even after getting his ass kicked by Bruce Lee, he was still the manliest person on earth.
(He still is)
-When Chuck was only a few months old, he got sick and sneezed. That sneeze is now known as Hiroshima.
When he was in his 20's, he sneezed again. That sneeze is now known as Tsar Bomba.
-There was once actually life on mars. Then there was Chuck Norris on mars.
-Many people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
-Chuck Norris won a staring contest with Slenderman.
-Most people cut butter with a knife. Chuck Norris can cut a knife with butter.
-Chuck Norris once played a game of russian roulette with all the bullets in (and went first). He won.
-Chuck Norris was once bitten by a snake. The snake died 2 days later.
-Whenever Chuck Norris steps on a Lego, the Lego cries.
-Chuck Norris acted in Star Wars. His role was the Force.
-Chuck Norris has a gmail account. It is:
gmail@chucknorris(dot)com
-Chuck Norris does not do push-ups; he just pushes the earth down.
-Under his beard, there is only another fist.
- Before the boogyman goes to sleep, he checks under his bed for Chuck Norris.
-When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, the zombie turns into a Chuck Norris.
-Jesus can walk on water. Chuck Norris can swim through land.
-Chuck Norris does not need a GPS. He decides where he is.
Facts about Chuck Norris:
-Chuck Norris was born on may 6, 1945. Nazi Germany surrendered the next day.
(Look it up)
-Even after getting his ass kicked by Bruce Lee, he was still the manliest person on earth.
(He still is)
-When Chuck was only a few months old, he got sick and sneezed. That sneeze is now known as Hiroshima.
When he was in his 20's, he sneezed again. That sneeze is now known as Tsar Bomba.
-There was once actually life on mars. Then there was Chuck Norris on mars.
-Many people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
-Chuck Norris won a staring contest with Slenderman.
-Most people cut butter with a knife. Chuck Norris can cut a knife with butter.
-Chuck Norris once played a game of russian roulette with all the bullets in (and went first). He won.
-Chuck Norris was once bitten by a snake. The snake died 2 days later.
-Whenever Chuck Norris steps on a Lego, the Lego cries.
-Chuck Norris acted in Star Wars. His role was the Force.
-Chuck Norris has a gmail account. It is:
gmail@chucknorris(dot)com
-Chuck Norris does not do push-ups; he just pushes the earth down.
-Under his beard, there is only another fist.
- Before the boogyman goes to sleep, he checks under his bed for Chuck Norris.
-When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, the zombie turns into a Chuck Norris.
-Jesus can walk on water. Chuck Norris can swim through land.
-Chuck Norris does not need a GPS. He decides where he is.
by Name removed by the NSA December 11, 2013