MathPlus's definitions

Hell

A four-letter word that most people would avoid talking about because they live their sinful lives as if mercy has no due date, or that they would have the time to turn away from their unethical or destructive behaviors, or to repent from their sins, at the eleventh hour.

CEOs and dictators, who think that they’re not as evil as the Hitlers, Stalins, and the Osamas, reason that because hell has reached full capacity, their chances of being redirected to heaven are pretty high in spite of their manifold transgressions.

by MathPlus July 28, 2022

A bump is worth a thousand words.

When a situationally ethical US President broke his promise to make a rogue country a “pariah” over its grim human rights record, by fist-bumping with its de facto ruler, who green-lighted the murder of a dissident journalist.

The choreography of President Biden's interactions with the Saudi crown prince, which exonerates a grisly murder with the victim being dismembered without the rogue mastermind being made accountable, shows that a bump is worth a thousand words.

by MathPlus July 16, 2022

Covid-🐍

When people in some places are more likely to be bitten by a snake or cobra during a lockdown than contracting the coronavirus—these venomous reptiles are being spotted more frequently as they search for smaller or middle sized animals, which have moved away from their natural habitat, to survive.

Due to frequent lockdowns in a number of cities in China, people are more afraid of Covid-🐍 than Covid-19.

by MathPlus July 5, 2022

Covid-🤝

When people are advised to avoid handshakes to lower the risk of getting infected with Covid-19, but urged to think of alternative ways to greet one another—for instance, they could bump elbows; embrace the Thai wai and say hi in prayer-like posture; or use the “footshake.”

Guesstimate how many handshake alternatives have emerged worldwide to combat Covid-🤝.

by MathPlus June 29, 2022

Mask Piracy

When morally bankrupt individuals flushed with cash tried to divert a shipment of masks bound for a certain country to another destination, while the goods were being transferred between planes in a transit country.

Besides sending people waving cash to buy a planeload of masks meant for France on the tarmac in China, the Trump administration was accused of mask piracy after diverting 200,000 masks meant for Germany to its shores while they were on transit in Thailand.

by MathPlus April 27, 2022

Decovidized Air

Manufactured oxygen boosted with antibacterial agents that promises to kill all coronaviruses and their variants, which might serve as a natural substitute to constantly wearing a face mask and annually being jabbed one or twice a year.

In case this decovidized air thing really works, Joe decided to order a few tanks from Alibaba—doesn’t it look like finally some snake oil salesmen have brought in some fresh air in the field of creative marketing, especially in the midst of a pandemic?

by MathPlus April 4, 2022

Covid Plan

A life insurance policy that covers any corona-related incident that threatens the client’s peace of mind in most cases 24/7, except when they contract the coronavirus via infidelity and visits to any red-light district.

Sayed bought a Covid plan for himself and his third wife (but not for his other spouses) in the aftermath of the country’s strategy for everyone to “live with Covid-19.”

by MathPlus March 23, 2022