MagickDio's definitions
People that try to make christianity "cool" often refer to Jesus Christ as "J.C". It's an attempt to suck in as many kids and sinners as possible, owing to the fact that chavs and skanks have been naming their kids with just initials for the last 20 years. There is a handful of C.J's, A.J's, D.J's, J.D's and M.J's in every community. The J seems to be the key letter here. And claiming that they're on a "team" makes the possibility of hooliganism seem way more likely. Obviously, the idea is that the idiots will all flock to those on "Team J.C" thinking that they will be having an excellent time with a cool person if they join them.
What they do get is as much religious tea as they can drink, a few dry biscuits, people with soft and weak voices telling them that God loves them all and possible molestation and inappropriate behaviour from the Vicar and/or Choir Master.
They tend to recruit in non confrontational ways, like going up to some kids in town and asking them if they're having a good day, or on their way to a party before they give them a leaflet.
Those in charge of "Team J.C" can often be heard saying things like, "You know what, gang? It's prayer time! Come on, let's give it up for the Lord!" or even "Paper chains ARE cool, now let's attach them to this easter bonnet before the flour and water paste dries"
Really, the J.C should stand for "Just Crazy"
What they do get is as much religious tea as they can drink, a few dry biscuits, people with soft and weak voices telling them that God loves them all and possible molestation and inappropriate behaviour from the Vicar and/or Choir Master.
They tend to recruit in non confrontational ways, like going up to some kids in town and asking them if they're having a good day, or on their way to a party before they give them a leaflet.
Those in charge of "Team J.C" can often be heard saying things like, "You know what, gang? It's prayer time! Come on, let's give it up for the Lord!" or even "Paper chains ARE cool, now let's attach them to this easter bonnet before the flour and water paste dries"
Really, the J.C should stand for "Just Crazy"
"Oh Lordy, it's Team J.C, dead ahead"
"How do you know they're on the team?"
"Check it out, they've got bumbags stuffed full of leaflets and Evanessence T shirts on! Plus, look at those crazy, vacant smiles.......they're on the team! Quickly, kids, run to the car!"
"How do you know they're on the team?"
"Check it out, they've got bumbags stuffed full of leaflets and Evanessence T shirts on! Plus, look at those crazy, vacant smiles.......they're on the team! Quickly, kids, run to the car!"
by MagickDio March 18, 2010
Get the Team J.C mug.Twatman is the drunken guy you seriously need to avoid. He's the one who thinks he's a superhero. He will feel up and slobber over every female within grabbing distance, churning out such winning lines as "You're beautiful, you are. HEY! Did you know that, I said you're beautiful? Cos you are." and "Love, do you wanna come back to my flat and let me fuck you?". These lines are usually delivered whilst Twatman has his face pressed into an unfortunate woman's neck, breathing hotly and rasping his words in a sex killer's voice. Outside, with his mates, Twatman will give them appalling representation by yelling slurred insults at men that were innocently passing by, and inciting a gang style hatred between the two groups, when really, they could have just gone home. Twatman will fight like a retard following a laser pen, will lose and will cry on his knees, bellowing the name of his current or former girlfriend. He will then walk through traffic, dismissing the vehicles as a threat to him and will search out a kebab van. After purchasing the greasy nastiness, he'll wolf it down and puke. He'll tell his mates that he loves them, then get rowdy about it. He'll end his night drenched in sick and gutter filth, plus his own piss, and will be most definitely NOT having sex. He will have ruined everyone's night. These are the powers of Twatman. Bravo.
"Keith turns into Twatman when we go out drinking, lets not invite him, EVER"
"Last night you behaved like a total Twatman, you were really out of order, and you deserve to be horsewhipped, or possibly to die for making that girl cry. I could have ended up fucking her if you hadn't come over and scared her off!"
"Last night you behaved like a total Twatman, you were really out of order, and you deserve to be horsewhipped, or possibly to die for making that girl cry. I could have ended up fucking her if you hadn't come over and scared her off!"
by MagickDio April 19, 2010
Get the Twatman mug.When you finally succeed in meeting that one person that you've fantasized about, finding out that they're pretty awesome and then getting naked and naughty with them........that, my friend, is a total fuckcess! Take a mental photo album of the occasion, and browse at leisure- this one is gonna make you smile for a long time yet.
by MagickDio April 3, 2010
Get the Fuckcess! mug.An act that's both devilish and delicious at the same time. Such as getting your own back on someone by coating their face in superglue and rice krispies whilst they are sleeping. Evil, yes, but soooo worth it.
"She cried when she saw she had no eyebrows, but that just made it even more devilicious! HA! Bitch"
by MagickDio March 2, 2010
Get the Devilicious mug.1) To give someone the hard eye is to look at them with disapproval/disdain/dislike. You give someone the hard eye when you don't know them- you just know you don't like them. Like when someone won't stop swearing when you've got small children with you. That merits a serving of hard eye.
2) To appraise something critically. One assumes that aspiring models are given the hard eye when they apply to an agency. It's when you look for things to dislike rather than things to like.
2) To appraise something critically. One assumes that aspiring models are given the hard eye when they apply to an agency. It's when you look for things to dislike rather than things to like.
1) The mouthy teens on the bus continued to talk at deafening volume and play offensive rap music on their mobile phones, despite being given the hard eye by 90% of the passengers.
2) After giving Vanessa the hard eye as she walked to the loo, Doug decided he wouldn't be taking "her" home after all.
2) After giving Vanessa the hard eye as she walked to the loo, Doug decided he wouldn't be taking "her" home after all.
by MagickDio January 9, 2011
Get the Hard Eye mug.A guy who always tries to get the same girls as you, and often manages. Your sexual histories contain a lot of the same names, and you hate and fear one another, yet oddly respect your equal potential for ho wrangling. If you ever encounter one another at a urinal, you will both sneakily try to glimpse each other's equipment, to assess the enemy's capabilities. You will never again talk to female friends who bed your rival.
You should never engage in a threesome with your dick enemy, no matter how hot the girl is, as you would likely half kill her through your mutual need to prove yourself the best, and then end up almost killing one another in a fight.
You should never engage in a threesome with your dick enemy, no matter how hot the girl is, as you would likely half kill her through your mutual need to prove yourself the best, and then end up almost killing one another in a fight.
by MagickDio August 20, 2010
Get the Dick Enemy mug.Comes from the way pissed up folk say "best friend." To be a "bessfriend" for any length of time is incredibly unfortunate. You attain this dreaded status by having a drunken person latch onto you and tell you all their problems, cry on your shoulder and generally kill your groove. Several times, through hiccups and sobs about ex partners, you will hear the words "You're like my bessfriend, you are." Note- you don't even have to really KNOW this person to be their bessfriend for the night.
The worst bessfriend situations occur when they are members of the opposite sex. You either get cock blocked or pussy locked all night by the weepy eyed, wretched looking individual clinging desperately to your wrist.
The worst bessfriend situations occur when they are members of the opposite sex. You either get cock blocked or pussy locked all night by the weepy eyed, wretched looking individual clinging desperately to your wrist.
"Why didn't you come to the club last night? We all wondered where you got to. Did you go home?"
"No such luck. Some mental bitch in Yates's decided to make me her "bessfriend" for the night, and I just could NOT shake her!"
"No such luck. Some mental bitch in Yates's decided to make me her "bessfriend" for the night, and I just could NOT shake her!"
by MagickDio April 24, 2010
Get the Bessfriend mug.