Definitions by Love-fi
The Caterbury Tales
A reimagined and remastered masterpiece of medieval literature in which all the pilgrims—and their stories—are played by cats. Designed to encourage cat enthusiasts, whose literary horizons may not trespass beyond Puss in Boots, to discover the jewels of Middle English storytelling.
Geoffrey: Excuse me, I’m looking for The Caterbury Tales.
Librarian: I’m terribly sorry, sir. That title is currently out on loan, and there’s a rather long reservation list. However, we do have A Cat Catcher in the Rye.
Librarian: I’m terribly sorry, sir. That title is currently out on loan, and there’s a rather long reservation list. However, we do have A Cat Catcher in the Rye.
The Caterbury Tales by Love-fi December 15, 2025
Walden
(verb, after H. D. Thoreau)
To retreat to a solitary natural setting not merely to escape society, but to be poetically missed—to heal with a soulful, reflective interlude.
To retreat to a solitary natural setting not merely to escape society, but to be poetically missed—to heal with a soulful, reflective interlude.
Earwin: My dear fellow, it is not mere boredom. It is deeper. I feel the ennui of this existence; sometimes, I long to simply… hide away from society.
Wilbur: Earwin, I believe what you need… is to Walden.
Wilbur: Earwin, I believe what you need… is to Walden.
Hidini
(noun. Portmanteau of 'Hide' and 'Houdini')
A person who performs a masterful, Houdini-like social disappearance, often without a trace.
To play (a) Hidini: To vanish so completely from one's social life it's like they were sawed in half and locked in a trunk.
A person who performs a masterful, Houdini-like social disappearance, often without a trace.
To play (a) Hidini: To vanish so completely from one's social life it's like they were sawed in half and locked in a trunk.
Maud: Have you seen Marigold since she went to the lakes?
Bethany: Not a glimpse. She seems to have... vanished.
Maud: I believe she has played a Hidini.
Bethany: A full disappearing act? I hope she played a Walden.
Bethany: Not a glimpse. She seems to have... vanished.
Maud: I believe she has played a Hidini.
Bethany: A full disappearing act? I hope she played a Walden.
Illegulls
Gulls of dubious migratory status, considered a public menace to gentlemen, children, and especially to skaters.
Ottilie: This morning, while taking my walk along the pier, I was accosted by an illegull.
Lynette: Impossible, darling. It must have been a legal eagle. Those illegulls are quite outlawed on this pier.
Ottilie: I assure you, it was an illegull.
Lynette: Did you report it?
Ottilie: I tried. The officer asked for its description. I said, "White and rude." He replied, "Madam, that describes almost half the visitors to the pier."
Lynette: Impossible, darling. It must have been a legal eagle. Those illegulls are quite outlawed on this pier.
Ottilie: I assure you, it was an illegull.
Lynette: Did you report it?
Ottilie: I tried. The officer asked for its description. I said, "White and rude." He replied, "Madam, that describes almost half the visitors to the pier."
Gullfriend
Lynette: I’m longing to introduce you to my gullfriend. Do you mind?
Ottilie: Not at all. In fact, today suits me.
Lynette: Fabulous. Oh! Punctual as ever—is she! That’s her “I’m-approaching-the-balcony” call.
Ottilie: Not at all. In fact, today suits me.
Lynette: Fabulous. Oh! Punctual as ever—is she! That’s her “I’m-approaching-the-balcony” call.
Gullfriend by Love-fi December 11, 2025
Mansplaining planner
A board with a calendar used to plan methodically when to do mansplaining, choosing the topic and the victim
Mildred: I would swear that man owns a mansplaining planner because he always mansplains to me from Monday to Friday at the same hour about what feminism is and what it isn't. I always receive his condescending tutelage on this topic at 17:19 sharp.
Gertrude: Same topic at the same hour?
Mildred: Indeed, Gertrude, indeed.
Gertrude: And what about Saturday and Sunday?
Mildred: A mercy, I assume. He must think I need to have a rest!
Gertrude: Same topic at the same hour?
Mildred: Indeed, Gertrude, indeed.
Gertrude: And what about Saturday and Sunday?
Mildred: A mercy, I assume. He must think I need to have a rest!
Mansplaining planner by Love-fi December 10, 2025
Tomato Tom
Ziggy: Do you remember Tomato Tom?
David: The one who was floating around his tin can?
Ziggy: Yes. He was floating in a most peculiar way.
David: The one who was floating around his tin can?
Ziggy: Yes. He was floating in a most peculiar way.
Tomato Tom by Love-fi December 9, 2025