Yoko Matsugane

The holy grail of poon, a Japanese girl with big eyes, great legs and unholy natural tits.

Her refusal so far to display her wicks or vag only increases her charm, though I wouldn't object if she did either.

Check Youtube for clips if any doubt remains to you.

Christ. Yoko Matsugane would get rammed across the Alps if I had my way.

by Lord Grimcock October 09, 2008

SeekingMillionaire

If I was rich and worthy I wouldn't use a dating site. If I was beautiful and charming I wouldn't use a dating site. I can only assume there's a huge unclaimed pool of clueless rich twats and foxy bitches out there, and that the rich twats are clueless enough to want to marry one of the other set despite there being nothing but cosmetic legal or social cred attached to marriage.

I found my husband on SeekingMillionaire, and I divorced him six months later. Mission accomplished.

by Lord Grimcock November 23, 2007

puddle-jumper

British. A male homosexual; a noofter, a ponce, a heemasex, a friend of Dorothy. Also puddle-skipper.

The instant I heard he had been to a Westlife concert of his own free will I knew he was a raging puddle-jumper.

by Lord Grimcock September 13, 2007

spazware

Incompetently produced software, or cheap software that is an inferior knockoff of a more successful line, for example Serif PagePlus. Not as bad as cuntware, but a waste of space nonetheless.

I waited months for Master of Orion 3 and all I got was this piece of fucking spazware.

by Lord Grimcock December 29, 2007

bookie's biro

British. The state of the old man after multiple bouts of spirited fellatio - that is, chewed to fuck. Can lead to gangrene.

I came back from my weekend at Julie's with a cock like a bookie's biro.

by Lord Grimcock September 13, 2007

blind skater's elbow

Descriptive of a severely chafed penis following sustained sexual activity, masturbation or having being fellated by Esther Rantzen.

I went up the road to Cabanatuan for a pint of milk and came back with a cock like a blind skater's elbow.

by Lord Grimcock May 25, 2008

hog's eye

The interface between the urethra and the outside world.

We got him to confess to Jill Dando's murder by forcing hot things up his hog's eye.

by Lord Grimcock November 24, 2007