Loopydave's definitions

dribbling clam

A sopping wet vagina, as wet as an otters pocket due to arousal. Not to be confused with venereal discharge.

After seeing Mary's dribbling clam, Rupert realised no extra lubrication was required.

by Loopydave January 17, 2011

gypsies eyelash

I detached pubic hair caught between the glans and the foreskin, resembling the crooked eyelash of a gypsy

No Rupert, I'm not putting that into my mouth unless you have a through Gentleman's Wash and remove the three Gypsies Eyelash sobbed Mary

by Loopydave November 23, 2016

trumpeter's lips

When the anal sphincter is puckered and slightly open due to a state of extreme fear, resembling a trumpeter's lips

It was a bleak winter's day on the somme, rifle in hand and with the trumpeter's lips Rupert knew he would be going over the top today and meet his demise on foreign soil

by Loopydave December 1, 2018

chutney lobster

When messy anal beads are pulled out and have two massive lumps of feces on the end resembling a dripping chutney smothered lobster

Rupert was quite appalled at turning Mary on with anal beads when he pulled out a chutney lobster

by Loopydave October 18, 2018

paul daniels weed

Extremely strong dense nuggets of cannabis. So called because when you put a tiny nugget in a grinder and grind then open it you are shocked by the amount of ground cannabis in there and shout out "Magic!", the catchphrase of the late and annoying twat of a magician Paul Daniels

Rupert realized he had bought paul daniels weed when after a single blunt he could barely move and feasted on Rice Crispies

by Loopydave February 21, 2019

nodding dog

A woman, usually drunk and ugly, performing oral sex in the back seat of a car. In reference to the bobble head 'nodding' characters British people would put in the rear window of there car, often a Churchill Dog.

Office manager Rupert received the full nodding dog treatment from the drunk PA Mary in the taxi on the way home from the office party.

by Loopydave March 15, 2019

clown's pastie

An absolute disgusting crispy semen coverered bulbous labia example of a slags pastie aka a drunkards late night meal. Most likely diseased, and wears fake prada and orange makeup.

Rupert phoned the clinic with much hesitation about his blistered knob and his wife's clown's pastie

by Loopydave December 17, 2018