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Krakky McKraken's definitions

crater-faced cunt

Another euphemism for the Pork Orc. In other words, an unwashed belligerent liar one must work for.
Zeke: I had to work through my lunch hour because Betsy thinks I came in an hour late.

Clem: Crater-faced cunt.
by Krakky McKraken November 5, 2006
mugGet the crater-faced cuntmug.

manceptionist

Zeke: The new receptionist's voice is kinda husky, don't you think?

Clem: That's because we've hired a manceptionist.
by Krakky McKraken November 12, 2006
mugGet the manceptionistmug.

Hallway Heisman

A maneuver usually performed by, but not limited to, a Skape, when traveling down a hallway with other people. Similar in posture to the famous Heisman Trophy, with the exception that instead of clutching a football to the stomach area, the individual performing the Hallway Heisman will grasp the small of their back, in a hunched over position. The Hallway Heisman is mainly used to ward off approaching people, so as not to be bumped into due to a "back injury".
As soon as the Skape saw the Human Resources person coming, she suddenly stopped running and assumed a Hallway Heisman position.
by Krakky McKraken November 15, 2006
mugGet the Hallway Heismanmug.

hillbilly haiku

A poem, spoken by hillbillies, that *sounds* something like haiku but doesn't scan like it. A hillbilly haiku doesn't fit the 5-7-5 syllable scheme, or even have three lines, because hillbillies can't count.
This is a hillbilly haiku.

Dead dogs
Dead, dead dogs.
by Krakky McKraken October 9, 2005
mugGet the hillbilly haikumug.

shishkabobulated

The pain caused when you're plowing through shis-ka-bobs and keep impaling the roof of your mouth on the skewers. Maybe you ought to slow down before you move on to the next one, big fella.
Kid: Hey Albert, you want some cake?

Albert: Oh, I'd love some, but I'm all shishkabobulated from poking myself 15 times in the last hour. Maybe later.

Kid: How 'bout now?

Albert: Now's later. Okay.
by Krakky McKraken October 24, 2010
mugGet the shishkabobulatedmug.

Purple Inchworm

The shrivelled, atrophied penis of a sick twisted disturbed fuck. All that comes out is a tiny drop of a congealed yellow liquid, created from years of disuse.
Zeke: Why did Lenny just run into his office and close the door?

Clyde: Did he have his mail with him?

Zeke: Yeah.

Clyde: Ah, then it must be time to whip out the ol' purple inchworm for a grueling hour of futile jackin' off.
by Krakky McKraken August 4, 2007
mugGet the Purple Inchwormmug.

sick twisted disturbed psychotic fuck

Worse than a sick twisted fuck. Worse than a sick twisted disturbed fuck. A sick twisted disturbed *psychotic* fuck is so vile, so putrid, so *unbearable* that no punishment in hell is sufficient to destroy him. Cheap. Crazy. Chases everybody around with inscrutable, mind-numbing questions. Mumbles when he talks and has so little love for his own family he'll ruin everyone else's lives in retaliation. The kind of deranged freak you want to crucify in an empty swimming pool and set on fire. You want to sit his kids on his chest, then pull his scrotum up over his head, forcing his kids to gnaw their way free.
STDPF: Hi, I was in on Sunday & I found these boxes of old envelopes. I know they have our old, old address on them but I figure you can just scratch that out with a pencil and use them, what does it matter, who opens them anyway, just a fucking secretary? If you could do that to every envelope, I think there's 1500 of them, get that done by lunchtime, that'll be great.

(slurps coffee)

STDPF: Now, I found these three boxes of pencils, so if you want to sharpen them all, I know they're kinda old and don't have erasers but I think people might want to use them, they write really well and maybe you can even use them to scratch out our old addresses! Now here...here are 8 boxes of letterhead with my name on each sheet, if you could just cross my name off of them we can use them for official correspondence and that way we can save a few bucks and maybe get you some part-time help a few months from now maybe a high school kid in the afternoon after school but you're doing a great job as it is-----

Clyde: Would you shut *up*, you sick twisted disturbed psychotic FUCK?
by Krakky McKraken June 26, 2008
mugGet the sick twisted disturbed psychotic fuckmug.

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