Pitchin' in the mirror is when you are so depressed and lonely that the best part of your life is the wonderously pleasurable feeling that you sometimes get when pitchin’ a loaf, so much so that you put a mirror in front of the toilet so that you can witness the look of pleasure on your face and savor these glorious moments of fecal delivery while pretending that your reflection is another person, a compassionate friend.
Bro, ever since I found out how hard it is to become a rock star and my girlfriend got abducted by The Grays, I've been pitchin' in the mirror.
by Jaunty Diggles September 07, 2019
The queef oven, although similar in some ways to the world renowned Gordon Ramsay-approved dutch oven, actually is much more...how do you say en francais? Gaysty! And really untasty! In fact, consider this your fair warning NOT to eat anything cooked in the queef oven, or the oven itself.
Fat bitch Proudtrucky Keirsten, from Pensultucky, FL, sure does like to put her daughter's poop into her queef oven. She calls that mesquite.
by Jaunty Diggles June 07, 2021
Pussy footin' is when you are balls deep cowgirl in what you think is a delicious drink of tang and she's sloppy wet from all the solid fuckin you been doing. Then, much to your surprise she climbs off your bangstick and slathers her dripping snatch all over your feet and proceeds to lick them clean.
I KNEW Keirstin was fucking dicksgusting when I was drunk-bangin her last night and she started pussyfootin' me. It was so vulgar that I barfed my steak and cheese all over her fugly-ass titties.
by Jaunty Diggles September 07, 2019
There comes a point in the life of a superstar where he's pleasured so much deliciousness that he can no longer continue. But his ego lives on. And so to continue to flaunt his profound man-prowess while simultaneously signaling to women that he's off the fucktrain but still of esteem, value and wealth, the tour de force will surgically have his testicles removed and then have 7 lucky gold doubloons sewn up inside instead, thus turning his scrotum into a JINGLEBAG.
Man, I heard Brad Pitt scored so much tang that he just didn't care about fucking anymore and went jinglebag.
by Jaunty Diggles August 25, 2019
Chuddlepasting is the disturbing act of spackling your partner's (or pet's) fresh, hot fat shit into your own buttcrack with a garden trowel.
by Jaunty Diggles August 24, 2019
Kicking Mitchie is when everyone facing eviction or bankruptcy from COVID 2020-related lack of governmental financial support and relief, courtesy of Mitch "Bitch" McConnell's-led retarded assfuckery of a Republican Senate, shows up their local Republican congressperson's house on Christmas Day to take turns kicking him or her in the face. And the genitals. And then the face again. Then, its a first-come-first-serve free-for-all looting festival where the angry newly-impoverished American citizens steal everything not locked down from the property while making sure to leave as many piles of flaming feces in their wake. It is assumed that so much badly-needed catharsis will be felt during Kitching Mitchie 2020 that it will be cemented as a yule-time tradition for years to come.
If you thought Juneteenth was cool, you're gonna love Kicking Mitchie. Better show up early while the gettin's good.
by Jaunty Diggles December 25, 2020