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Jacques Asse's definitions

Asshole Lessons

Asshole Lessons are special preparatory courses given to douche bags.

Your boss had the whole lot of them.
Jesus, you flippin' ballsacker, what? Have you been taking ASSHOLE LESSONS?

You're, like. the World Champion of sphincters.
by Jacques Asse October 16, 2009
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Cunt bandit

A cunt bandit is someone who steals the pootie, and then throws it away so nobody else can bang it.
Trent and all other faggots with similar names are prima facie examples of the cunt bandit.
by Jacques Asse April 21, 2009
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Up the Rabbit Hole

The process of vomiting.
Phred had a bit too much to drink last night, thus went Up the Rabbit Hole.

Drunk bastard.
by Jacques Asse June 2, 2009
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Assterroids

The assterroids are a particularly virulent form of diabetic diarrhea event, in which poo is commonly splattered over the inside of the toilet stall.
Tom and Lance had assterroids last Wednesday, and we have the proof.
by Jacques Asse April 2, 2009
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Nig Rock

Nig Rock is a galactic, cosmic asswipe that runs around saying stupid things like "Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy".

Like anybody EVER uttered a fucking sentence like that.

Real niggers don't even SPEAK that way, but Nig Rock, living in his drug-addled little world pretends that people think he's a badass just because he was "inspired" to scrawl out some nonsense like "Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy".

It is actually Satanic language referring to the end of the Cosmos.
Bawitdaba da bang a dang diggy diggy diggy said the boogy said up jump the boogy.

Please, find me a stupider lyric EVER written in any language upon the face of this planet. Such mindless drivel could only originate in the foul bowels of the mind of Nig Rock.

God help us.
by Jacques Asse December 28, 2009
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Jewbris

Jewbris is Jewish hubris. A condition of Jewish "pride" despite the fact that Jews are the most despised race ever belched forth upon Planet Earth.
Heeb Goldrubyberg's ridiculous self-adoration and intense pride in the small, dusty cuntry of Israel indicate the extent of his jewbris.

He needs a heebectomy.
by Jacques Asse January 5, 2010
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Goasting

Goasting = goat + fisting, or goat fisting. The process whereby one powerfists a goat, and then carries it around on their arm for several days, flapping one's arms like a large bird, saying "baw, baw, baw" with eyes crossed is goasting.

Women can also be involved in the late stages as the goat falls off the arm, which can then be used to cunt punch.
Goasting: it's what's for dinner.
by Jacques Asse June 25, 2009
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