Altamonte Springs

A Florida suburb, about 20 minutes outside of Orlando and slightly cheaper to live in than Orlando. If you aren't rich enough or are too scared to live in Orlando-the murder capitol of the state-you move to Altamonte Springs, aka "The Springs" to the locals (esp. the local teens/kids). If there is a right place in all of the Orlando metropolitan area, Altamonte Springs is it. Positioned in the geographic heart of Central Florida, Altamonte Springs provides a solid base of white collar personnel and support services with the convenience of a location that virtually eliminates the daily challenge of commuting to work. Altamonte Springs boasts a dynamic mix of fine retail establishments, hotels, upscale offices, commercial space, abundant restaurants, and housing in all price ranges. In addition to single-family and multi-family homes nestled in lakeside and tree-shaded communities, Altamonte Springs is located in one of the more affluent areas of Central Florida. The City’s current population for 2009-2010 is 43,243.
The 6 largest Retail Centers in the City:
-The Altamonte Mall
-The Marketplace @ Altamonte
-West Town Corners
-Renaissance Center
-Oak Grove Shoppes
-Altamonte Crossing

"Dude, there's nothing to do!"
"I know. If we wanna find a party or something we gotta get out of The Springs. Let's head for Orlando."
"Are you crazy? You wanna leave Altamonte Springs to go to Orlando! Unless we go straight to Disney World, we'll get shot!"

by Jace555 March 22, 2009

The They People

The They People are the extremely large group of people who other people love to talk about. The They People know everything, are constantly giving advice, are experts in every field, and seem to be filled with expressions and sayings. The They People are vets, lawyers, doctors, philosophers, military, teachers, librarians, and any other profession you can think of.

“They warned me my aquarium should only have 1 inch of fish for each gallon of water.”
“They moved the Terror Level to yellow.”
“They told me to only tan for 20 minutes the first time.”
“They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away.”
"You know what They say; lying only leads to more lies."
“They do, do They?”
"Yes They do."
"Who the hell is this "They" everyone talks about?”
"You know…They. The They People."
"They" are pretty messed up saying obvious crap all the time."

by Jace555 May 24, 2009

Unread Online Syndrome

A temporary fit of anxiety. This is a very common affliction caused when you send a message to someone on MySpace when you see they are online, then sit and wait for them to respond. After a couple of minutes you open your Sent Mail and see that it is still Unread. You have now entered the Unread Online Syndrome. You sit there hoping beyond hope that the message gets opened before he/she logs off, because if not, then who knows how long till the person logs back in. You refresh the page every couple seconds. You check your Inbox anyways, making sure that it isn’t a glitch saying it’s Unread when it’s really not. You begin to feel panic. “Is he/she gonna see that there’s a new message before logging?!?” There is no escape. You have been infected with Unread Online Syndrome and the only cures are if the person finally opens the message or just logs off.

Joey got sick last night. He was on MySpace and for 3 hours he suffered from Unread Online Syndrome before Angel finally wrote him back. But by then it was too late and he was convulsing on the floor.

by Jace555 May 05, 2009

Loserbet

When you see a girl who is way hotter than the guy she is with, you know she must have lost a bet to be dating him. This unproportionately hot girlfriend is a Loserbet.

Guy 1) "Damn, that girl is smoking!"
Guy 2) "Wait, wait! That guy behind her.. is he her boyfriend?!"
Guy 1) No way man. He couldn't possibly.."
Guy 2) Woah! He just kissed her!
Both) "Loserbet!!"

by Jace555 December 10, 2009

Scape Goating

Derived from the noun Scape Goat, Scape Goating is the act of driving the speed limit or at least going with the flow until a car goes flying past you. At this point you pull out of your lane and into his, and use him as a Rabbit. The idea is to maintain a reasonable distance behind the other car and to go slightly slower than him so that he will get caught in any speed trap up ahead and you'll have time to react, slow down, and continue on your way. Not only does this work for speeding, but you can also follow him if he is constantly switching lanes, and rest assured that he will also be the one to get the reckless driving ticket, too, in place of you. This works best on highways and interstates, but can really be used on any kind of road with at least 2 lanes in either direction.

Driver in red car: "Man, I think this guy's been Scape Goating off me for the last couple miles. I'm gonna slow down so he passes me."

Passenger in red car: "Ok, he just passed you. Now let's Scape Goat off of him."

----

Passenger in red car: "Oh man, we've been Scape Goating off that Hyundai for 10 minutes, but he's exiting."

Driver in red car: "That's ok, we'll just find someone else to Scape Goat."

by Jace555 May 04, 2009

Unproportionately Hot Girlfriend

When you see a girl who is way hotter than the guy she is with, that is an unproportionately hot girlfriend. She is unproportionately hot compared to how hot he is.

Dude, your girl is a 10! But you, you're more of a 4. She is definitely an unproportionately hot girlfriend.

by Jace555 December 10, 2009

Involuntary "You Too"

When out of habit you reply to a comment with "You too". This happens to the best of us.

Two common situations of the Involuntary "You Too"

Girl: Well happy birthday man. Have fun at Sea World tomorrow.
Guy: Thanks, you too.
**uncomfortable silence**

Parent: Drive safe and have fun.
Son: Ok you too.
**uncomfortable silence**

by Jace555 May 08, 2009