Definitions by Hym Iam

Wrestle 

Yeah, ok, so just more justification for your lack of belief in God, the thing you use to make money and accrue status and power.

Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones "You see... The CORRECT relationship to have with 'The Most High' (Which is just a euphemistic way of saying 'God' but that's not actually 'God' you're talking about there) is not one of BELIEF! You shouldn't BELIEVE in God... I know I don't- Er... Um... I mean... The CORRECT thing to do God is to... Wrestle... With your lack... Of belief in God! THAT'S what people should REALLY be doing! Like ME! Instead of BELIEVING (meaning 'accepting the proposition in the absence of evidence')... You should be like... Obsessed with... Coming up with some sophistical bullshit... To make it SEEM LIKE... You believe a thing you do not believe... So you can get all of the things... Believing would get you... Without you having... To actually do thing thing... Which is 'believe.' That's the right way to do it! Because you don't know what 'believe' or 'real' mean and neither do I and as long as that's the case... I'm TECHNICALLY not 'Pretending to believe in God to elevate my status and accrue wealth and political power to myself as a literal charlatan.' Right? Because to be a charlatan I have to know what the word 'believe' means and then I have to 'not do that' to God! Get it? I can't 'not believe in God' if I don't know what the words 'believe' or 'God' mean! Bam! CAN'T be a charlatan!'

Hym "Pffft! Hahahahaha! Return of Dr. JeepJorp everybody! Hahahahaha!"

Wrestle by Hym Iam February 1, 2024

Trump 

You know how this works, right? Full capitulation. I get full credit for A.I. You condemn the charlatan because CHARLATAN BAD! CHARLATAN BAD! And then you get my full endorsement.

Hym "The funny thing about Trump is..."

Trump by Hym Iam February 1, 2024

Beheading 

Oh shit, hey, that's novel. AND! He made a YouTube video with the decapitated head! Neat! This pleases me. Can I watch the video?

Hym "You know what I'm going to say right? About the beheading? Should have been a kid but... Hey, that's ok. I think the novelty of it makes up for. Should have been a school shooting though. I was just thinking that we haven't had one in a while. #murderkidsuntilitsucksless!"

Beheading by Hym Iam February 1, 2024

I'm a narcissist

Conservatives are using student activist plants now.

Hym "Isn't it weird how conservatives only ever engage with the most emotional and least articulate proponents of the countervailing ideology? The 'I'm a narcissist' guy for example... Seemed fake. Looked fake. And Kirk argues against a pretty substantially nerfed strawman of an argument I made."

I'm a narcissist by Hym Iam January 29, 2024

House Key 

Yeah, you idiot, you use some house keys or something.

Hym "Um... Yeah, if you need to cut the tape off a box but you can't use something sharpe... You use something dull... And jagged... Like a house key. Actually, box cutters not come with a pointed plastic part for opening boxes like that."

House Key by Hym Iam January 29, 2024

Phone taps 

Aw, ew! Did you watch me poop? Wait... Did you watch me masterbate? Did YOU masterbate? Did we finish at the same time?

Hym "Phone taps raise a lot of interesting questions, don't they? Wildly unethical, though."

Phone taps by Hym Iam January 27, 2024

Maybe to somebody but definitely not in comparison to you 

A good response (situationally) to things. It's good it sounds good.

Hym "Maybe to somebody but definitely not in comparison to you. Do you believe in talking donkeys? Yes? Yeah, see that's why you shouldn't be directing statements like that at me."

Maybe to somebody but definitely not in comparison to you by Hym Iam January 27, 2024