HMB's definitions
The state or act of being pretentious - affecting an air of superiority or culture where none truly exists.
"The latest discovery of Jane Austen's unprinted masterpiece, 'Pointlessness and Pretentiosity', brings together the dramatic cycle with a fitting juxtaposition of anagnorisis and perepetaea, providing the quintessential climax and denouement if you will, to a genre that is already fucking full of shit to be honest."
Siskel and Ebert, "Two-Birdies-Up Film Reviews"
Siskel and Ebert, "Two-Birdies-Up Film Reviews"
by HMB March 27, 2003
Get the pretentiositymug. Shorthand for "Hitler's moustache". This describes a woman's pubic hair when she has shaved almost all of it off, leaving only a thin strip of hair covering her vulva.
So named for its similarity to Adolf Hitler's moustache, which was threefold:
a) It was also narrow and dark.
b) It also "lay above the lips".
c) It can move hypnotically, with a strange effect on the weak-minded.
So named for its similarity to Adolf Hitler's moustache, which was threefold:
a) It was also narrow and dark.
b) It also "lay above the lips".
c) It can move hypnotically, with a strange effect on the weak-minded.
I asked my first girlfriend if she would shave her beaver, and it turns out she was a member of PETA so I ended up getting slapped.
Then I asked my second girlfriend if she would shave her Map of Tasmania, and it turns out she was an Australian Aborigine so she cut me with a flint-knapped knife.
Last night I asked my third girlfriend to shave her Hitler tash, and she looked at me and said "I'm Jewish".
If the Mossad come looking for me, I'm not at home, okay?
Then I asked my second girlfriend if she would shave her Map of Tasmania, and it turns out she was an Australian Aborigine so she cut me with a flint-knapped knife.
Last night I asked my third girlfriend to shave her Hitler tash, and she looked at me and said "I'm Jewish".
If the Mossad come looking for me, I'm not at home, okay?
by HMB December 28, 2008
Get the Hitler tashmug. 1. National Missile Defence. A controversial plan to set up a series of interceptor systems to destroy incoming nuclear warheads and render an entire nation safe from missile attack.
2. A virulent curse in Mandarin Chinese, as coined by late Qing Dynasty and early Republic of China writer Lü Xun, who defined the "national curseword" of the Chinese people as "ni ma de", or literally "your mother's ...". Lü Xun never specified what possession or part of the mother is meant, but one can presume it is obscene.
Compare this with TMD and WMD.
2. A virulent curse in Mandarin Chinese, as coined by late Qing Dynasty and early Republic of China writer Lü Xun, who defined the "national curseword" of the Chinese people as "ni ma de", or literally "your mother's ...". Lü Xun never specified what possession or part of the mother is meant, but one can presume it is obscene.
Compare this with TMD and WMD.
1. President Bush: "We intend to ignore Chinese governmental protests, and to go ahead with plans to install a working NMD."
2. President Jiang Zemin: "Well, in that case all I have to say is 'NMD'. And now I'm going to play the piano."
2. President Jiang Zemin: "Well, in that case all I have to say is 'NMD'. And now I'm going to play the piano."
by HMB March 12, 2004
Get the NMDmug. 1. (horticultural) A perennial bud found in moist valleys, amidst ferns, and which like to nestle up against redwoods.
2. (anatomical) A perineal bud found in moist valleys, amidst pubes, and which like to be jostled by redwoods. A clit.
2. (anatomical) A perineal bud found in moist valleys, amidst pubes, and which like to be jostled by redwoods. A clit.
1. and 2. "For Valentine's Day, do something special. Give her LADYWOOD."
~ failed marketing ploys of HM&B corporation.
(First heard in NBC's Will & Grace)
~ failed marketing ploys of HM&B corporation.
(First heard in NBC's Will & Grace)
by HMB February 10, 2004
Get the ladywoodmug. A daily newspaper, founded in 1982, and funded by the Unification Church and Reverend Sun Myun Moon. Although begun as a conservative counterweight to Communism, the newspaper has gradually won respect for its journalism. Today, it is held in high esteem for its Metropolitan pages and its non-ideological foreign news pages, although the editorial coverage still retains a firmly conservative viewpoint.
Ever since HMB went to work at the Washington Times, his contributions at urbandictionary have tapered off into nothingness. One can only hope that his literary output is being put to equally creative uses.
by HMB March 6, 2004
Get the Washington Timesmug. 1. (noun, botanical) A growth process whereby a plant sheath or stem segment grows back on itself, essentially turning itself inside out.
2. (noun, CIA/FBI/NSA) An interrogation process whereby a suspect is bent back on himself or herself, essentially turning them inside out.
3. (noun) An intercourse process whereby a body part or prop (e.g., vibrator, cell phone, TV remote, etc) is placed into the vagina.
4. (cartographical) On Olde Worlde Mappes by Iohn Speede, c. 1626, this term meant "having taken one's leave to abscond to Amazonia". Literally "within a country of vaginas".
2. (noun, CIA/FBI/NSA) An interrogation process whereby a suspect is bent back on himself or herself, essentially turning them inside out.
3. (noun) An intercourse process whereby a body part or prop (e.g., vibrator, cell phone, TV remote, etc) is placed into the vagina.
4. (cartographical) On Olde Worlde Mappes by Iohn Speede, c. 1626, this term meant "having taken one's leave to abscond to Amazonia". Literally "within a country of vaginas".
1. David Attenborough: "But once the fly trap is fed a piece of meat, time-lapse photography demonstrates a dramatic change in growth. By the third invagination, the Venus fly trap has already offered up two new leaves."
2. John Ashcroft: "But once the Eye-rackie is tied to the rack, time-lapse photography demonstrates a dramatic change in growth. By the third invagination, the Taliban suspect has already offered up three new accomplices. Even better, by the fourth invagination, he was no longer able to speak or make any noise at all. A good day's work for the NSA."
3. HMB: "Dude, your aunt is really starting to freak me out. Last time we made out, she suggested invagination, and I agreed. But she made me wrap a brick in cellophane and stick it up her pussy. You don't pay me enough for this sort of crap. I'm going back to Taco Bell."
4. When the American troops arrived in Hanoi to reinforce the ARVN troops there, they quickly learned the skills to stay alive, including camouflage, mine detection, and most importantly, avoiding the major fighting from the vantage point of an observatory invagination - often in groups.
2. John Ashcroft: "But once the Eye-rackie is tied to the rack, time-lapse photography demonstrates a dramatic change in growth. By the third invagination, the Taliban suspect has already offered up three new accomplices. Even better, by the fourth invagination, he was no longer able to speak or make any noise at all. A good day's work for the NSA."
3. HMB: "Dude, your aunt is really starting to freak me out. Last time we made out, she suggested invagination, and I agreed. But she made me wrap a brick in cellophane and stick it up her pussy. You don't pay me enough for this sort of crap. I'm going back to Taco Bell."
4. When the American troops arrived in Hanoi to reinforce the ARVN troops there, they quickly learned the skills to stay alive, including camouflage, mine detection, and most importantly, avoiding the major fighting from the vantage point of an observatory invagination - often in groups.
by HMB February 8, 2004
Get the invaginationmug. "A fayre visaged manne was in the partee,
Lipsed of voyse, and limpe of wriste eek.
Ful wynsomme a crafty butcher was he,
We played heide thee sausage and I could not sitte downe for a weeke."
- Geoffrey Chaucer, Prologue to the Canterbury Tales
Lipsed of voyse, and limpe of wriste eek.
Ful wynsomme a crafty butcher was he,
We played heide thee sausage and I could not sitte downe for a weeke."
- Geoffrey Chaucer, Prologue to the Canterbury Tales
by HMB March 16, 2003
Get the crafty butchermug.