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Definitions by GroceryClerk

Having a Blind Circle-Jerk

When a group of people are thoughtlessly agreeing with each other even if they are holding opposing views.
"Why are all those people talking at the same time? Are they high?"
Nah dude, they're having a Blind Circle-Jerk.

Depressengers 

The team you join when you realize you are too fat, lazy and out of shape to be a super-hero and too stupid to be a super-villain.
"The Despicable Bulk. Whore. Can't-Man, Black Man/her, Fat Piggo, and small Dick Fury. Depressengers ASSEMBLE!"

Crampissed 

That time of month coincides with the holiday season and your significant other is PMSing and breaking your balls worse than the nutcracker.
"Where is the popcorn tinsel?"
"In the bag, inside the kernals."
"Someone's being Crampissed"
"Huh? What was that?"
"Mistletoe....wet kiss..."
"Damn right..."
Crampissed by GroceryClerk May 29, 2018

Dapper-Crapper 

When someone is able to walk out of a bathroom stall and still look cool.
"You see that twirl he did over by the hand dryer. Made his coat look like a pimp-cape."
He's one Dapper-Crapper."
Dapper-Crapper by GroceryClerk March 2, 2016

Netflix and Spill 

When you watch Netflix alone, surrounded by food and end up ruing your sheets for a different reason.
"What brings you to Bed, Bath and Beyond today sir?"
"I was just having a netflix and spill ."
"Say no more. Single sized sheets are in the back."

One Upper 

That person who has to be better at everything. Even when they shouldn't want to.
"I remember once as a child I accidentally killed a squirrel."
"Aww that's nothin' bro. I used to kill animals all the time."
"Really?! What the hell is wrong with you freak?
"Oh you think you're disgusted in me? You should see how disgusted I am at me!"

A One Upper
One Upper by GroceryClerk March 2, 2016

Lard Tunderin Jaysus 

The Newfoundland exclamation to show approval or disapproval depending on the circumstances.
Pronounced "Lord Thundering Jesus" by most.
A versatile phrase in the Newfoundland dictionary that can be used in various ways.
Positive-
Bill: Wheres 'da beers
Frank: Right 'ere b'y
Bill: Lard Tunderin Jaysus, 'bout time

Negitive-
Bill pulls into driveway and notices his house has been broken into.
Bill: 'da fuck?
Opens fridge
Bill: Lard Tunderin Jaysus, They even took the ever-sweet margarine.
Lard Tunderin Jaysus by GroceryClerk November 22, 2011